


Mrs. & Mrs. Smith (Swan) SQ AU

by PipexVauseman



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Assassins & Hitmen, Alternate Universe - Movie Fusion, Alternate Universe - Mr. & Mrs. Smith Fusion, F/F, Inspired by a Movie, Minor Violence, Non-Canonical, Originally Posted on FanFiction.Net, Some Humor, action packed rom-com adventure, alternate universe - no familial ties
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-30
Updated: 2017-03-30
Packaged: 2018-10-12 22:33:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 31,213
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10500798
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PipexVauseman/pseuds/PipexVauseman
Summary: Inspired by the 2005 movie Mr. & Mrs. Smith. No magic, no familial ties. Major rom-com action movie feels.AU: John and Jane Smith are a normal married couple, living a normal life in a normal suburb, working normal jobs...well, if you can call secretly being assassins "normal". Neither Jane nor John knows about their spouse's secret, until they are surprised to find each other as targets.





	1. Happy Wife, Happy Life

**Author's Note:**

> If you have yet to read Mrs & Mrs Swan by hoovahoopah please do so because it is amazing and needs to be finished.
> 
> Originally posted this on FF, cleaning up the editing and throwing it over here.

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**Present Day**

"Okay, I'll go first," Emma says with a nervous chuckle, shifting uncomfortably in her seat. "Let me say, we don't really need to be here. See, we've been married five years--"

"Six."

"Five, six years," Emma brushes off Regina's correction without sparing her a glance, "and this is like a check-up for us. Chance to poke around the engine, maybe change the oil. Replace a seal or two."

"Stop rambling."

This time Emma does shoot Regina a glare and the psychiatrist is the one to shift uncomfortably.

"Very well, then," Archie loosens the tie around his neck. "Let's pop the hood."

Regina rolls her eyes, "I sincerely doubt either of you know your way around a car engine."

Emma narrows her eyes and scowls, "What exactly is that supposed to mean?"

"It means your metal coffin on wheels was retired for a reason."

Emma frowns thinking about the custom storage shed in their back yard which was expanded in size to fit tools for the gardeners _and_ her old yellow Volkswagen. Regina had voted for demolition but the shed was their compromise.

Seeing he needs to diffuse the situation before an argument can start three minutes into their session, Archie interrupts.

"On a scale of one to ten, how happy a couple are you?"

"Eight," Regina answers immediately.

"Ten being perfectly happy and one being totally miserable, or--"

Regina sighs, "You're stalling."

"Just respond instinctively," Archia amends with a kind smile."

"Okay."

"Ready?"

Emma nods and Regina stares at him blankly.

"Eight," they answer in unison.

"How often do you have sex?"

Regina flicks imaginary lint off her skirt, "I don't understand the question."

"Yeah, I'm lost." Emma doesn't sound lost, just evasive. "Is this a one to ten thing?"

"Is one very little, or is one nothing? Because technically speaking, zero would be nothing."

Emma would like to point out that her wife is now the one rambling, but she doesn't really want to answer the question either.

"How about this week?" Archie suggests.

Emma squints, as if trying to recall. "Including the weekend?"

"Sure."

"I don't understand the relevance," Regina interrupts suddenly, nervously twisting her wedding band around her finger. "Can we discuss another topic?"

"Describe how you first met."

Regina's lips curve up forming a small smile for the first time since the session began, "It was in Colombia."

Emma smiles as well, "Bogota. Five years ago."

"Six."

And just like that the spell is broken and they both return to their impassive expressions.

"Right. Five or six years ago."

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.

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**Five Or Six Years Ago**

Emma sits at the bar of her hotel room reading a newspaper and sipping coffee when the sound of sirens catches her attention. She can hear the sound of countless emergency vehicles traveling down the street outside in quick succession. She sits up, looking out the window as a group of armed men enter the building.

She motions over the bartender and asks him what's going on. He tells her The Huntsman has been killed and the police are looking for tourists traveling alone.

The men are yelling out orders when Emma turns to look over her shoulder for an exit. One of them notices her immediately and she shifts, leaning back on her elbows against the bar and subtly reaching for the gun tucked into the waistband of her jeans. It's too hot here to conceal her guns in a shoulder holster under her leather jacket and the metal is a heavy, reassuring weight against her back.

The man who noticed her motions for another officer to approach and as he does he calls out to her, "Estas sola?" She shakes her head and holds her hand up to her ear, acting like she doesn't understand. "Estas sola?"

A disturbance is caused when a woman barges into the building followed closely by two more heavily armed men while she ignores their calls for her to show them her papers.

Emma immediately disregards the man approaching her, her entire focus shifting to the beautiful woman in front of her as they openly stare at each other in what can only be described as unashamed eye sex.

"Papeles," one of the officers shouts, getting in the other woman's personal space. "Estas sola?"

"No," she replies simply, further annoying him.

As he moves to grab her by the arm and escort her god knows where--certainly out of Emma's life forever--Emma steps forward, unable to see this beautiful woman go.

"No, no, no. Esta bien," she says in a broken accent, not noticing the bartender giving her a funny look because he had just been speaking with her in perfect Spanish. "She's with me. Esta bien."

She extends her hand and when the woman takes it, Emma quickly leads them away from the men asking questions in the lobby and back to her room, locking the door behind them. They both lean against it, listening to the commotion still going on outside. The woman looks up then and catches Emma's eye, giving her a smile and extending her hand again, this time for a hand shake.

"I'm Regina," she whispers.

"Emma," the blonde replies.

She doesn't release Regina's hand after she shakes it. Instead, she holds the woman's wrist in a loose grip, gently stroking her palm and giving her a shy smile.

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They get lost among the locals and drink tequila at a small party in the center of town. After a toast to 'dodging bullets', Regina has had enough people watching and stands, once again extending her hand to Emma.

"Dance with me."

Her voice is smoky like the smell of the bonfire surrounding them in the outdoor fiesta. The sound burns its way down Emma's spine like the tequila burned its way down her throat.

The brunette leads Emma to the makeshift dancefloor and pulls her closer with an index finger hooked though a belt loop. Emma places her hands on Regina's hips, Regina's arms loosely drape over Emma's shoulders, and the two seem to melt together. They sway to the music, foreheads touching, lost in each other.

The band plays on and their touches get more firm. Emma's fingers dig into Regina's hips and Regina's fingers lightly scratch down Emma's spine under her shirt. Emma leads Regina through a small spin before pulling her close so her back is flush against Emma's front. She gently loops her arms around the brunette's waist, holding her in a warm embrace and brushing sweet kisses against her neck.

She hears Regina humming along to the music and gets lost again, out of the lust and into something more. Something that feels a whole lot like she could love this woman. Normally a thought like that would have sent her running for the hills, but on that particular night it leads her back to their table where she takes a seat and pulls Regina on her lap.

The brunette straddles her hips as they share sips directly from the bottle of tequila and the rumbling thunder they heard off and on all night finally turns into a torrential downpour. Everyone else runs for cover while Emma simply tightens her hold on Regina's hip with one hand and drops the bottle of tequila from the other, using that now free hand to cup the brunette's face and pull her in for a searing kiss.

When Regina moans Emma slides both hands down to squeeze her ass before lifting her to sit on the tabletop. She kisses Regina's neck again, this time with more teeth than just a sweet press of lips. Regina spreads her legs more and directs Emma's hands up her thighs.

Emma hikes Regina's skirt up around her hips and drags both hands up her thighs to the apex of her legs. She lets her thumbs gently trace both sides of damp lace panties and though the rain is pouring down on them she knows the dampness is there for her, from her.

"Em-ma," Regina moans out, and the way she says it sends a fresh shot of arousal straight to Emma's core. "Touch me."

Emma uses her left thumb to gently pull lace to the side while her right thumb drags a slow trail up the wet folds. Emma and Regina both moan at this and when they lock eyes they both snap and their slow, sensual love making suddenly becomes fast, hard fucking.

Emma captures Regina's lips in a passionate kiss; her thumb rubs against Regina's clit; her fingers pump in and out of Regina; Regina throws her head back, the rain makes her white dress transparent; Emma sucks on the space between her neck and shoulder marking the skin; Regina's hips rock and the tequila bottle falls off the rattling table; Emma lifts off her seat and leans forward to bite a nipple through the wet fabric of both dress and bra; Regina's palms come down hard and slap the tabletop in time with her chants of _'yes, yes, yes'_ ; Emma drops to her knees in the wet, muddy dirt; Regina grinds against Emma's eager tongue and holds her in place with a fist full of blonde hair.

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When Regina's orgasm rips through her the sound of thunder drowns out her screams.

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Regina wakes up alone the next morning and momentarily panics before remembering the events from the night before, what brought her to the bed in the hotel room she's naked in and the blonde who is renting it.

She stretches her sore muscles before sitting up. The sheets are cool and there's no sight of the blonde anywhere. Just as a wave of disappointment settles in her stomach the door opens.

"Hiya stranger," Regina smiles in relief, not yet ready to say goodbye.

If she's being honest with herself, she doesn't know if she'll ever be ready to say goodbye now.

"Hiya back," Emma says with a shy smile. She locks the door behind her and walks to Regina's side of the bed, placing a tray in front of her. "I think room service fled. I did what I could," she grins up at her with another shy smile.

"Thank you," Regina says sincerely, touched the blonde would think to be so considerate.

The tray has two cups of coffee, sugar, milk, and a newspaper. Emma takes one of the cups and turns, opening the doors to the balcony and stepping outside. She leans on the railing and sips her coffee, looking out at the city below while the woman in her bed looks at her.

Regina adds a splash of milk to her coffee and takes a sip, humming in approval.

"Oh, that's good."

"I hope so," Emma looks over her shoulder with a teasing sparkle in her eye. "I had to milk a goat to get it."

Regina notices the headline of the newspaper mentions the assassination of The Huntsman and when she picks it up off the tray to read the article she sees a flower had been hidden beneath it. She twirls it between her fingers before looking up and catching Emma's eye. She tucks the flower behind her ear and Emma gives her another shy smile and that's what does it. She definitely isn't saying goodbye now. The blonde looks as smitten as she feels.

She moves from the bed, meeting Emma on the balcony and they pull each other into a sweet kiss that quickly intensifies when Emma carelessly drops her cup of coffee in favor of pulling Regina close. The glass shatters like her resolve.

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**One Month Later**

They'd been joined at the hip since meeting in Colombia but on this particular morning Emma woke up and realized they'd never gone on an actual date since everything else fades away, getting lost in the background when the lust takes over, as soon as they're together.

The early morning sunlight had seemed to make Regina's tan skin glow at dawn and Emma could feel herself falling deeper. She'd never been the dating type but she realized from the beginning that this was somehow different, much more than simple lust. She wanted everything with this woman, even cheesy dates at the fair where they could go on rides and play games and Emma could win her a silly stuffed animal.

And that was exactly how she found herself--on a cheesy date at the fair, her arm around Regina's shoulders, unable to resist pressing a kiss to the brunette's temple as they strolled, undeniably in love. 

"Step right up, ladies and gentleman. Try your luck." Regina catches the attention of the vendor at one of the booths they wander by. "How about you, little lady? Wanna try your luck? Win a prize?"

Regina smiles mischievously and Emma smirks at the evil glint in her eye, already knowing how competitive the brunette can be.

"Yeah, all right. Two," Emma tells the vendor, holding her cup of beer between her teeth so she doesn't have to drop Regina's hand to reach in her pocket for some cash to pay him.

"Two," he repeats. "We got two over here."

It's a shooting booth, little targets twirling, spinning, and flipping around to the sound of classic arcade music. Emma leans back with a cocky grin and watches Regina pick up the airsoft rifle from where it's chained to the counter. She's beyond sure that she'll be better at this than the brunette and _god_ she's looking forward to the competitive snark sure to come her way. There's something about the passion Regina gets in her eyes that Emma finds intoxicating and there's no quicker way to find it than riling the brunette up.

"Do you know how to hold it?"

Regina doesn't miss the cocky grin or the fact that Emma's already trying to push her buttons, but she has a cover to maintain, even with the blonde she's finding herself falling for more every day. She pushes down her natural urge to shoot all the targets perfectly (and maybe then Emma) and holds the rifle in a loose, awkward position against her small frame. She stands rigid and holds the rifle way too low to provide her with the ability to aim accurately, then pulls the trigger, moving in random directions.

Emma chuckles at the fumbled attempt, "You gotta aim it."

"I am," Regina giggles. Sure, Emma's made her giggle before by surprising her in the shower or kissing her neck while whispering sweet words in the dark, but this is a fake giggle meant to distract Emma and further prove she's just a silly girl who doesn't have any clue how to handle a weapon. It works. Emma laughs harder and shakes her head in fond exasperation. "Don't laugh," Regina narrows her eyes, playfully threatening, "I'll kill you."

In the end she only hits 4 targets with 10 shots.

"You didn't blink," the blonde admonishes her with a shake of her head before picking up her own rifle and holding it up to her shoulder, looking through the sight and hitting 8 out of 10 shots. She shrugs at a scowling Regina like it's no big deal. "Beginner's luck. Do we still get something?"

When the vendor passes Emma a small stuffed animal she holds it out to Regina and shakes it with a lazy smirk because even though it's a prize they both also know it's a taunt.

"I want to go again," Regina tells her stubbornly because while it's a game they both also know it's now a fucking competition.

"Going again," Emma chuckles and digs some more cash out of her pocket.

While she's distracted passing her cash over, Regina holds the rifle correctly and looks through the sight. This time she hits 9 out of 10 shots.

Later, Emma hands her small stuffed animal to a kid running through the crowd because Regina's holding a stuffed bear that's so big she's not sure she'll be able to fit it in the back seat of the Bug. She drapes her arm back over the brunette's shoulders, pulling her close and dropping a kiss to her cheek.

"Where'd you learn to shoot like that?"

Regina looks up at her with an innocent smile and bats her eyelashes, shrugging her shoulders in a very Emma-like fashion.

"Beginner's luck."

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**Two Weeks Later**

Emma is sparring with August while Ruby stands outside the ring yelling at her.

"You've only known the girl for six weeks!"

"I'm in love," Emma grunts, dodging August's swinging fist. "She's smart, sexy..." she bounces lightly on her feet, waiting to jab at him, "...uninhibited, spontaneous, complicated. She's the...sweetest...thing... I've ever...seen," she adds, firing off body shots.

"I knew Peter Wolfe two and a half years before he asked me to marry him."

"You turned him down!"

"My point is, you have to have a foundation of friendship, Em. The other stuff fades," Ruby retorts, then gets distracted by some actual boxers entering the gym, finding the handsome muscular men more attention-grabbing than the lecture she's providing. "Hi."

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On the other side of town Regina is indoor rock climbing with Kathryn who has some concerns of her own.

"So you don't think this is all happening a little fast?"

"You know I never do anything without thinking it through."

"What does she do?"

"She's in construction. Big-time contractor."

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August has Emma pinned, his knee in her back and his forearm across her jaw, pushing her face into the mat while she struggles against him.

"A server goes down on Wall Street, she's there. Anytime, day or night," she finally wiggles enough to break free of his hold and flips over but he still has her restrained with his legs. "She's like Batman for computers," she grits out.

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"She's gone as much as I am," Regina adds, wiping her brow with the back of her forearm. "So it's perfect."

She can't see Kathryn on the line beside her because she's gained considerable distance above her--just like the shooting game at the fair, everything is a competition--so she doesn't notice the way her friend's eyes widen disbelievingly at the word 'perfect'.

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"I give the whole thing six months, tops."

Emma and August are locked against each other in what would (outside of the ring) maybe look like a drunken swaying hug but is now (inside the ring) a less-than friendly grapple. She looks over his shoulder and locks eyes with Ruby.

"Rubes, I asked her to marry me."

"WHAT?" August yells and flips her over his shoulder, slamming her to the mat.

"I'm getting married," comes Emma's muffled reply. She's on her back with her arms tucked up to protect her face while August punches her.

Ruby still hasn't wrapped her mind around what just happened, "What?"

"I'm getting married!"

"What? I can't hear you."

August keeps swinging.

"...getting...married..."

"I can't hear. August, can you stop hitting her? She said something crazy."

August stops swinging but yanks Emma off the floor and into a chokehold, "Clearly, she _has_ gone crazy!"

"I'm getting..." she chokes a little when August squeezes harder and manages to slightly pull his bicep away from her throat, "...married."

August shakes his head and drops Emma to the mat where she lies wheezing on her back. She takes a deep breath and lifts one hand in the air, victorious.

"You think you won?" August asks incredulously and barks out a loud laugh. Maybe he should stop choking her during these matches, she's obviously in need of oxygen to her brain.

Ruby still can't find the words to reply.

"Of course," Emma chuckles in response, a little punch drunk and a little love drunk. "I'm getting married."

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**Present Day...Five Or Six Years Later**

Emma walks to the end of the driveway, sent by Regina with a cup of coffee to fetch the morning paper. She grinds her teeth, annoyed that her wife sent her out like a dog to retrieve it. Maybe not a dog, but definitely her wife's bitch.

Across the street she notices David Nolan doing the same and when he waves at her with a big, friendly smile she merely nods in acknowledgement before trudging back inside.

She can't count how many times she's heard him say 'happy wife, happy life' and maybe it's true because the residents of the Nolan estate seem awfully chipper while across the street in the Smith manor things are a bit more...icy.

She doesn't know what happened, where the fire went. She used to push her wife's buttons because it was amusing to rile her up and the passion that came from her lit fuse was intoxicating but now she does everything in her power just to get a reaction. Anything at all. It seems like her wife no longer loves her, but merely tolerates her presence.

When she'd brought it up Regina had suggested couple's therapy and Emma suspected it was a ploy to make her uncomfortable enough to drop the topic so, naturally, she agreed.

She leaves the newspaper on the kitchen table and goes upstairs, standing beside Regina at the double sink in their bathroom as they brush their teeth in silence. She brushes for longer than normal, purposely standing at her sink between Regina and the hook where she normally hangs her robe before stepping into the shower so maybe her wife will invite her in, or hell just be forced to acknowledge her. Regina apparently decides to go for Option C and simply passes the robe to Emma without a second glance.

The blonde extends her hand and carelessly drapes the robe over the hook it belongs on, letting it fall and crumple to the floor because she knows how much Regina hates a mess. Out of the corner of her eye she watches the vein in her wife's forehead pop out and her jaw clench, but she steps into the steam of the shower wordlessly.

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They both move around one another, silently getting dressed for work in their large walk-in closet.

"What did you think of Dr. Hopper? His questions were a bit wishy-washy."

Emma pulls a soft sweater over her tank top, instantly recognizing Regina's tone. The brunette is trying to get out of going back, but wants Emma to think it's her idea. Her back stiffens, but she replies in a bored drawl, "Yeah. Not the most insightful."

"And his office is clear across town."

Regina is giving her another reason not to go, which is all the more reason why they should return, but she doesn't feel like calling her out on it or doing this little dance right now, so she merely hums in agreement.

She turns then and sees Regina in her bra and stockings, garter belt visible since she's still holding her skirt on a hangar in her hand. She's got her back to Emma, standing on her tip toes to reach a blouse hanging off the top shelf with her free hand. Emma sighs, knowing it's dangerous to get any closer after seeing her wife in this state of undress. She knows she'll just want to touch her and the brunette will bat her hands away. But god damn it, she still loves the woman and she still thinks she looks adorable without the height her heels provide.

She moves to stand beside her, momentarily placing her hand on the small of Regina's back to still her movements before she reaches up and grabs the blouse for her. Regina looks up at her and when they make eye contact she can see a thousand different emotions swirling in her brown eyes. She wants to kiss away the ones that look like frustration and doubt and pain, not sure why they're there in the first place. When she leans in Regina steps back and looks down. She fidgets with the clothes she's holding, awkwardly putting them on.

Regina isn't awkward. Regina doesn't fidget. Emma bites her lip to keep from saying anything that might lead to an argument and shifts from one foot to the other, stuffs her hands in the back pockets of her jeans and gives in.

"Four o'clock means we hit rush hour. Not crazy about that."

Regina nods, like the matter has been resolved. "So that's settled then, yeah?"

Emma shrugs in the bored, careless way she knows Regina hates, "Okay."

Regina watches Emma's retreating form, headed back for their bedroom in defeat and closes her eyes, "Okay."

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They avoid each other while they finish their pre-work routines, only meeting again at the back door on their way out of the house. Emma silently lifts Regina's coat from the coat rack and helps her pull it on, Regina grabs the travel mug of coffee Emma forgets on the counter most days and passes it to her after she finishes pulling on her red leather jacket. It's another thing Regina hates that Emma uses to try and get a reaction out of her. Nothing today.

She follows her out the door to the garage, frowning once again when she thinks about her Bug being banished to the storage shed and glares at the car Regina had her buy to replace it.

She clicks the button to open the garage door and walks past Regina's new Mercedes and places her tavel mug on the roof of her new BMW so she can open the driver's door. Matching sleek black sedans. Expensive black sedans. 'Happy wife, happy life', Emma thinks with a roll of her eyes.

"Dinner's at seven," Regina reminds her.

"Yup. I'll be there. Here. Whatever."

They both pull out of the garage and drive down the driveway. When it narrows to form a single car exit they both slam on their breaks. Emma grinds her teeth and sighs, looking over and making eye contact with Regina before motioning with a sarcastic sweep of her hand for her wife to go ahead.

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Regina chops toppings for the salad she'll be serving with dinner, already annoyed when the timer on the oven starts beeping. She notices headlights and looks out the window, watching as Emma maneuvers in the extended portion of the driveway so she's able to back into her parking spot in the garage beside Regina's car. She looks back at the clock on the stove and notes it is 6:56. She twirls a knife between her fingers and glares at the closing garage door.

Emma sits in her car for a moment, collecting her thoughts before going in the house. She can't afford to sit out here too long. Heaven forbid she walk in at 7:01. She opens the compartment in the center console meant for change and retrieves her wedding band, slipping it back on her ring finger.

When she pushes the button on her visor to close the garage door she notices an odd red splotch on the collar of her jacket. She adjusts her rear view mirror and does a double-check, realizing it's not the red of the leather, it's a dirty smudge.

Most wives would have to worry about a dirty red smudge on their spouse's collar coming from lipstick. Not Regina. The red on her spouse's collar is blood.

Groaning, she gets out of her car and walks a little slower than she normally would in the rain, heading back to the main house and using the rain to wipe the remaining blood away.

"Hey babe," she calls out and hangs her coat on the coat rack and takes off her boots like a good, obedient wife. She knows walking into the kitchen with wet, muddy boots and a dripping leather jacket would definitely get her a reaction from Regina, but she's not sure that particular reaction would be worth it.

Regina glances back at the clock and notes that it is 7:00.

"Perfect timing," she says, relieved Emma didn't dawdle in the garage in an attempt to challenge her today for no reason other than to simply challenge her.

"It's pissing rain out there," Emma grumbles. She tosses her keys into the bowl by the door, the spot Regina dictates they be kept to maintain order, and finds her wife chopping vegetables in the kitchen. "I got the butter you asked for," she places it on the counter next to the cutting board Regina is using and presses a quick kiss to her cheek.

"How was work, dear?"

"Eh," Emma shrugs while thumbing through the mail, "so-so." She looks up when she hears the knife has stopped chopping and sees Regina looking at her expectantly. She knows her wife well enough to understand the brunette is wondering why she's just now walking in the door if work was just 'so-so'. Unless something had delayed her she should have been home an hour and a half ago and it doesn't take 90 minutes to pick up butter. "Oh, I stopped off for a drink with August."

"Hmm." Regina notices the label on the butter and frowns. "This is salted."

Emma looks up from the mail again, "What?"

"The butter," Regina sighs. "It's salted."

"Is there any other kind?" Emma asks in a bored drawl.

She can see the vein in Regina's forehead pulsing.

"Unsalted. The kind I asked for." She glares at Emma who just glares back. She knows what her wife is doing. Taking a deep breath she shrugs it off. "It's fine. I'll make it work." Deciding she's not going to give in and engage Emma in an argument she waits long enough for Emma to get to the bar and start fixing herself a drink before she decides to change the topic. "Oh, I got new curtains."

"Did you?"

Regina walks around the corner and notices Emma look up from her drink long enough to take a quick glance at the curtains and turn back to what she was doing.

"Well? What do you think?" Emma makes a non-commital noise and Regina presses on, "There was a struggle over the material. This tea sandwich of a man got his hands on them first, but I won."

"Of course you did," Emma mutters.

"They're a bit green, which I'm not wild about, so we'll have to reupholster the sofas and get a new rug. Maybe a Persian."

Emma's back stiffens, "Yeah. Or, we can just keep the old ones. Then we don't have to change a thing."

Regina glares at her, "We talked about this. You remember?"

"I remember," Emma nods her head and takes a sip of scotch. "I remember 'cause we said we'd wait."

Regina sighs, "If you don't like them, we can take them back."

"Okay," Emma nods again, seeing this for the trap it is but unwilling to back down. "I dont like them."

Regina fixes her with a look that would make anyone else wilt, "You'll get used to them."

Emma takes a longer sip of her scotch, "Yeah."

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"So, part two. Here we are," Archie uncaps his pen and places it on top of the legal pad on his lap. "Only this time, you came back alone. Why did you come back, Emma?"

"I'm not sure really," the blonde says with a shrug. "Let me clarify, I love my wife. I want her to be happy. I want good things for her. But there are times..." she holds her hands up, shaking them in the air and miming how she would sometimes like to just throttle her wife whom she loves and adores so much.

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"So, Regina. Why did you come back?"

"There's this huge space between us and it just keeps filling up with everything that we don't say to each other. What's that called?"

"Marriage."

She gives Archie an unimpressed look, "Helpful."

"What don't you say to each other?"

She thinks back to dinner the night before.

_"This looks nice. Did you do something new?"_

_"I added peas."_

_"Peas," Emma nods. "Yeah, it's the green." After a moment the silence between them starts to become suffocating and Regina silently wishes Emma won't ruin it trying to be combative. "Babe, will you pass the salt?"_

_So much for wishes. Emma knows her wife hates it when she adds unnecessary amounts of salt to food._

_"It's in the middle of the table."_

_"Oh," Emma feigns a tone of innocence. "Is that the middle of the table?"_

_"Yes," the vein in her forehead starts to throb. "It's between you and me."_

_They stare at each other, both daring the other to say or do something until finally Emma sits up and leans across the table, grabbing the salt and shaking it repeatedly over her food. Regina stops mid-chew to glare at her. The blonde cuts into the meat on her plate, scraping the knife against the china roughly so a grating sound echoes in the room like Regina's icy glare grates on her nerves. She takes another bite before picking back up the salt, shaking it over her food again, desperate for a reaction. Regina ignores her and takes a long sip of wine._

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"I know it probably feels like you're the only people going through this, but there are millions of couples that are experiencing the same problems."

Emma laughs, "Uh huh."

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.

"How honest are you with her?"

"Pretty honest. I mean..." Regina twirls her wedding band around her finger nervously, "...it's not like I lie to her or anything. We just--I have little secrets. Everybody has secrets."

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.

.

A few days pass after Emma and Regina both individually go back to visit Dr. Hopper. After dinner Emma rinses the dishes in the sink before stacking them neatly in the dishwasher, the way Regina likes it done, wanting to help her wife with cleaning up the kitchen after dinner.

Regina walks by and notices one of the plates in the dishwasher still has food on it and takes it back out, rinsing it again. Emma's teeth start to grind in frustration and she grabs her scotch from off the counter beside her and takes a large gulp.

When Regina turns around to gather the cutting board and knife from the kitchen island behind them, Emma snaps. With their backs to each other she knows Regina can't see her so she calmly raises the next plate and instead of rinsing it she cracks it over the edge of the sink, shattering it and sending glass raining down onto the floor by her feet.

She notices the vein in Regina's forehead and holds out an arm to keep her from coming any closer, "Sorry, babe. I'll take care of it."

Regina opens her mouth and whatever she was going to say dies instantly on her lips when the sound of her cell phone ringing is heard. She steps over the glass and hurries out of the kitchen to grab her phone before the call ends.

Emma finishes cleaning up the mess and loading the dishwasher, then washes her hands and grabs her now empty glass, heading back to the bar for a refill.

Grabbing her scotch she heads for the den to retrieve her own cell phone from where she had left it to charge when she notices Regina across the hall in the study. The door is just barely open and she can see the brunette's mouth moving, but she's too far away for Emma to hear any of what she's saying. She's looking at her computer and smiling at whoever is on the other line and Emma can't help but feel a little resentment, unable to remember the last time her wife smiled at her like that.

The brunette laughs and nods her head before ending the call and shutting down her computer. She types out a message on her phone as she leaves the room, oblivious to her wife watching her from across the hall.

Emma gives Regina 15 minutes to herself before wandering off to find her. She's in their room, her back to the door, fastening the belt on a long black overcoat. Emma rattles the drawer on her nightstand when she yanks it open, purposely loud to startle her. It works and Regina jumps a little.

"Jesus! Emma," she chuckles with nerves thick in her voice. "Darling, you scared me."

"I'm sorry, babe. I was looking for the..." she waves her hand around in a vague way, still rummaging in her drawer because she honestly doesn't know what she can say she's looking for in there. Regina is distracted though and doesn't seem to notice. "You going out?"

"Some moron crashed a server in a law firm downtown and ended the world as they know it, so yes."

"Hmm," Emma tries to use her lie detector but she's never been able to get a really good read on Regina. Besides, she's got some business to handle herself and it would be easier to let this drop for now before she has to provide an alibi of her own to sneak out for a little while. She looks at her watch and notes the time. She'll just need an hour or so to get this done. The time reminds her what their plans for later that evening were. "We promised the Nolans."

"I know. I'll be there."

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.

.

Regina has a cab drop her off outside the hotel where her mark is staying. A guard at the door to the suite tells her they have a plane to catch in an hour. He escorts her to the bedroom where she locks the door behind her.

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.

.

Emma has a cab drop her off outside the bar where her mark plays poker. She wanders past the tables and booths to the back where the bathrooms and entrance to the stock room are. Inside the stock room is a door labeled Employees Only. She removes her flask from the inside pocket of her leather jacket and takes a deep pull. Shaking her limbs loose she stumbles in the door, feigning drunkenness.

There are three men seated around a table playing poker and they all look up and start yelling when she walks in the door.

"What the hell?"

"Who the fuck are you?"

"What's this shite?"

"Sorry," she holds her hands up, appeasingly. "Where's the can around here? Hey," she lets her words out with a slow, lazy, drunken sounding lilt, "you guys playing poker?"

"Private game."

"Piss off."

"Could I sit in? You think I could--"

"What part of 'piss off' do you not understand?"

"Guys. Whoa, whoa. Be a little friendly. I got the cash," she reaches behind her back and one of the men pulls his coat aside, revealing a gun on his hip. "Dude. I'm just showing you my bank roll, man. I got the money," she pulls a wad of cash out from her back pocket and flashes it around the table. "You know what I'm saying? You know what I'm saying? You know what I'm saying? Poker? Don't even know her. So if you want me to sit down, I'll play some cards. If you don't, I won't. It's fine with me," she pretends to fumble with the cash, acting like she's going to slip it in the pocket of her coat and instead dropping it all over the floor at her feet. "Anyone interested? Nah. 'Cause I'll clean you out. I understand. Fine. Listen, I want--" she bends down then to pick up the cash, purposely banging her forehead on the chair in front of her. "Ouch! Hey, those are really nice shoes, man." She uses the chair she hit her head on to help herself stumble into an upright position, then points at it excitedly. "Here's an empty chair! I could sit here."

"That's Robin's chair."

"Where's Robin?" She turns in a full 360 degree circle. "I don't see Robin."

"Robin's not back yet."

"Then I'll sit here. Unless," she smirks at them, "you don't want to get your asses kicked by a girl."

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.

Regina can hear the mark gargling mouthwash in the bathroom. She rolls her eyes and shifts, standing at perfect attention and refusing to let her annoyance show further.

The man walks into the room and stops, taking a moment to eyeball her. He must like what he sees because he smiles and comes closer, nodding his head and signalling for her to lose the coat.

She loosens the belt and shrugs it off, letting it pool around her feet. The man's mouth hangs open when what is underneath is revealed.

Regina is wearing a latex dress (if you can even call it that). It's a skimpy little thing that stops at mid thigh, attached to a garter belt with fishnet stockings. A healthy amount of cleavage is on display and though he can't see it, she's sure her ass looks amazing thanks to the height provided by the ridiculously high heels she's wearing.

She reaches up behind her head and pulls a metal pin from the middle of her bun, letting the hair fall down in loose waves around her shoulders. Her hair is much longer than it was when she first met Emma and she thinks if her wife could see her now she would likely combust.

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.

"Solid silver," Emma assures her new poker pals when she puts her flask in the middle of the pot.

One of them picks it up to examine it and notices the engraving.

"'To dodging bullets. Love, Regina'."

"In the pot! Put it in the pot!"

"She's got nothing better than a pair of fives, mate."

"No way! You're the one with 14 different tells!"

"He is bleeding William Tell."

They're mocking him, humming the William Tell overture from The Lone Ranger when the door opens and a man says, "What the hell is this?"

"Sorry, Robin."

"Looks like you're done, Em. Thanks for the memories."

"Oh, are you Robin?" Emma looks over her shoulder at the man still standing in the doorway, "No kidding."

"What do you want? You looking for a job or something?"

"You are the job," she fires twice, the sound of his body hitting the floor louder than her gun thanks to the silencer on the end of the muzzle. She quickly slides her chair back from the table, grabbing her other gun in one fluid motion and holding both arms out, shooting the men next to her before turning her weapon on the man across from her. Standing up from her seat she does a quick sweep of the room, assuring all four men are dead before reaching across the table and checking the cards which have yet to be turned over. "Pair of threes," she grumbles.

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.

Regina has the man on his knees, hands cuffed behind his back. She walks around him, a riding crop dancing over his skin. She knows this isn't exactly professional, but her mother has always compared her to a cat batting a mouse around.

"Have you been a bad boy?"

She brings the riding crop down hard against his back and he moans.

"Yes."

"You know what happens to bad boys?" She hits him again and he moans louder. "They get punished."

"Ooh, yeah. Punish me."

He's beyond grossing her out now so she decides the time has come to finish this. She bends over, her hands sliding over his shoulders and around his neck as she leans in to whisper in his ear, "Have you been doing plastic surgery for members of the cartel, Dr. Whale?" When he gasps and starts to jerk away she snaps his neck and lets his body crumple lifelessly to the floor. She wipes everything down she's touched and puts her coat back on, tying the belt in place. Reaching in her pocket, she retrieves her phone, sending a text that her task has been completed and notes the time. "Ugh. The Nolans."

When she strolls out of the bedroom she tells his guards to let him rest and closes the door behind her before calmly leaving his suite and taking the elevator back down to the lobby. They don't notice something's wrong until she's already leaving the building. She can hear the yelling as she climbs in the taxi that drives her away.

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.

"Everything okay at work?"

"Yes, everything worked out fine. How was the game?"

"Game was good."

Emma knocks on the Nolans's front door and doesn't say anything else but she's got a lazy grin on her face and when Regina moves in closer to smoothe out some creases from the blonde's sweater she can smell the liquor on her breath.

"Have you been drinking?"

The lazy grin just gets wider and Emma shrugs, "I went to the sports bar with August. Put some money on the game."

Just as Regina's mouth opens to no doubt start lecturing Emma, the door opens to reveal the way too cheery smiles of David and Mary Margaret.

"Welcome neighbors!"

There's no reason a cop and a school teacher with an infant should look this sprightly all the time.

Emma makes small talk with David while they head towards the bar. He grabs them both a beer and motions her over to where he'd previously been chatting with Sean, Eric, and Phillip.

"How'd you make out last quarter, Emma? Take a beating?"

"Actually, I've got all my dough buried under the tool shed."

They all laugh and the conversation carries on but Emma's attention is drawn across the room where Regina is sitting on a couch next to Mary Margaret and Ashley.

.

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.

"So, Sean got the promotion."

"Oh my god, that is so great!"

"We are so excited. We can finally put the addition on the kitchen."

"That's great and--Oh, shoot. Not again. Shoulda worn a raincoat." Mary Margaret pulls her son back from the vomit on her shoulder and looks over at Ashley but she's already got her own daughter sitting on her lap, so she looks over at Regina. "Would you mind? Could you hold him for a second?" She tries to pass her son to Regina who immediately leans away.

"What? No."

"Please? I just need to get some seltzer. It'll only be a moment."

Without another word, she passes her baby to Regina who shifts him around from the awkward position Mary Margaret put him in her hands and adjusts his little body until she's holding him in the crook of her arm. He quietly stares at her and then he smiles.

"Aw," Ashley coos. "He likes you."

She looks up then and catches Emma's eye from across the room. The blonde looks down at the baby, then back at Regina and gives her a small, shy smile. It's a smile Regina hasn't seen in quite some time and it reminds her of Colombia. It reminds her of better days, days before her mother got in her head and reminded her that this marriage was just a farce and only to be used as a cover. _Love is weakness, Regina._

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.

In the bathroom doing their nightly routine before bed Emma looks up from the sink and watches Regina brush her teeth.

"I liked your dress tonight," she tells her sincerely with a timid smile. She's tired of the arguing, of everything being so hard. She misses how it used to be, when Regina used to let the blonde love her. "It was nice."

"Thank you," Regina smiles back but immediately feels guilty. If this is just a cover it's not fair to lead Emma on. She really does love the blonde, but letting her think she has any sort of hope making Regina feel more than what this needs to be is cruel to both of them.

When she gets in bed Emma is already there, curled up quietly on her side. She's given up trying to spoon her wife. Cuddling with the brunette tends to make Emma a little handsy and she's not in the mood for rejection tonight.

Just as Regina settles in under the covers her phone rings. She checks the caller ID and thinks about taking the call in another room but just as she moves to get out of bed Emma's phone rings too. They both answer and talk quietly with minimal responses before ending their calls and hanging up.

"Everything all right?"

"Yes. It was my mother. She thinks she has pneumonia. I'm sure it's just a cold, you know how she can be."

"Yeah," thinking quickly because now she'll need to get away for a few days, Emma throws a suggestion out into the literal dark. "Maybe you should go see her."

"Maybe," Regina agrees easily, thinking about how she'll have to get away for a few days anyway.

"Okay," Emma curls back to the edge of her side of the bed, facing away from Regina. "Goodnight then."

Regina starts to close her eyes before a thought hits her, "Who was that?"

"Hmm?"

"Who was on the phone?"

"Oh," Emma mumbles into her pillow. "Just the corporate office. Problem with the specs for that dam August has been working on. I have to fly out in the morning. I'll be gone a couple days."

"That damn dam," Regina muses to herself.

"That damn dam."

"Okay," she rolls over as well. "Goodnight, Emma."

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.


	2. Countdown Is Initiated

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Emma rolls her carry-on bag to the storage shed on her way out of the house. Once inside, she opens the door to a hatch hidden in the floor under her Bug and walks down the stairs, taking silent inventory of the weapons and cash stockpiled in the room.

She loads her bag with a bundle of cash, three bombs, and two handguns before throwing some ammunition on top. After zipping the bag closed she picks up a large case leaned in one corner of the room. It stands at shoulder height and has a large G-40 grenade launcher inside.

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Regina wakes up to an empty bed and cold sheets. She jumps up and heads downstairs, fiddling with the buttons on the oven and broiler in a seemingly random manner that when pushed in the right order enter a secret code, opening the oven and revealing a secret compartment inside housing all her handguns and knives. She selects one of each before closing her secret compartment and grabbing a cup of coffee from the pot Emma left warm for her.

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Granny greets her from the reception desk with a gruff, "Get rid of that gum."

Emma rolls her eyes, "You got a tissue or you want me to spit it in your hand?"

Granny lifts an unimpressed eyebrow and holds out a tissue in one hand and the trash can in the other, "Something crawl up your ass and die this morning, Mrs. Smith?"

"I've already got one lady griping at me in my personal life, I don't need it in my professional life too. What do you got for me?"

"Boarding pass, taxi receipts, hotel bill."

"Thanks."

"Don't lose those, you'll need them for your cover. Keep them in the folder."

"Morning, Emma," August says as he walks in. "How ya doin'?"

"Don't ask," Granny replies sarcastically.

"I'm _fine_. You?"

"Same old, same old. People need killing. Oh, Em. Might have a little get-together this weekend at my house. Barbecue, no ladies," he winks at Granny's scowl, "and drinks. It's gonna be awesome."

Emma nods and opens the door to her office, "Yeah, I'll talk to the missus."

"You want to use my cell phone? Maybe give her a call in case you decide to scratch your ass or take a piss later." He yells louder when Emma ignores him and closes the door behind her, "Make sure she thinks it's okay!"

"You live with your father!"

"Why bring him into this? He's a first-class guy. And I don't have to check in with him when I want to do something. He cooks, he cleans. He makes me snacks. And I'm the dumb one?"

Emma continues ignoring him and pushes the button that will close the blinds to her office, giving her total privacy from the outside world. She sits in the chair behind her desk, turns on her computer, and when it asks for her login ID she says "White Knight." The computer activates the home page for Gold's Guild, the hit firm she works for and an automated voice speaks to her.

"Hello, Emma. Quite the body count this week. We have a priority one, so your expertise is required. The target's name is Killian Jones A.K.A. Captain Hook," a mug shot and rap sheet appear on her screen. "He's a direct threat to the firm. DEA custody. They're making a ground-to-air handoff to heli, ten miles north of the Mexican border. I need you to make sure the target does not change hands."

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Regina steps off the elevator to the private entrance for i-Temp Technology. She walks in the door, past a reception desk, and through another door which is not labeled. The lights are low, allowing a full body x-ray while she stands still and the motorized walkway moves her forward for inspection. An automated voice asks for her code name to verify her voice ID while a retinal scanner focuses on her eye.

"Evil Queen."

"Regina Smith, confirmed. Stand by for contact."

A distorted image of the Queen of Hearts comes on screen. Had she not been raised by the woman she would have a hard time making out the picture. It's designed that way for a reason, to keep Cora's identity safe.

"Regina, dear," Cora's voice warbles on the transmission for the exact same reason. "I'm sorry I had to disturb your _stroll_ into the office, but we have a bit of a situation. You know the competition would love to see us burn. I need you to handle this personally."

"Of course, mother. Who's the target?"

"Killian Jones. I'm sending you the specs now. We need this quick, clean, and contained."

"Yes, mother."

The doors open and Regina walks down the stairs to the belly of the office where Kathryn greets her with a cup of coffee.

"Good morning, Regina." The brunette gives her a quick nod and accepts the folder she's holding out. "Yesterday's op resulted in one kill, one agent in protective custody."

Regina nods again, "We'll get him out tomorrow."

Lacey approaches them with a form Regina needs to sign, "Hello, ma'am. Two cases of G-40s are here."

"Order ten more." She motions for Kathryn to follow her to her office. "All right," she settles in the chair behind her desk and activates the projector on the wall in front of her. "Go, Kat."

Kathryn pushes a button on the remote in her hand, bringing up the specs. "The target's name is Killian Jones A.K.A. Captain Hook."

Regina's face wrinkles in disdain, "Are you serious?"

"Yeah. He's being moved across the border to a federal facility. The only point of vulnerability is just south of the border."

Regina studies the screen for a moment before giving her orders.

"I want GPS and SAC of the canyon and the weather report for the last three days."

"He'll rendezvous with a helicopter at a deserted airstrip. We've only got one chance to strike."

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.

.

Regina perches on the edge of an abandoned building she's using for cover and watches the caravan holding Killian Jones through her binoculars.

"Are we green?" Kathryn's voice echoes over the ear piece.

Regina checks her laptop which shows a 3D scan of the land around her highlighted by a green box indicating where she placed explosives.

"Perimeter is armed. We are up and running."

She kicks her feet out in front of her, enjoying the way the sun warms her skin, content to sit back and relax before the action to starts. 

Her eyes start to close so she doesn't see the dust being kicked up from the offroad vehicle quickly approaching, but she does hear the horrendous music it's blasting. Her eyes shoot open and she sits up in her seat, removing her sunglasses to get a good look at the Polaris RZR ATV speeding through the desert, driven recklessly by a maniac listening to 'Nothin' But A Good Time' by Poison.

"Oh, come on," Regina groans before picking up her binoculars and scanning the distance for the DEA convoy. She locks on to them before turning to focus on the ATV, projecting the image back to her office. "Are you getting this?"

"Affirmitive. Is it a threat?" On another pass around her green perimeter the ATV makes a sharp turn and kicks one of the stakes holding Regina's explosive charges out of the ground, triggering a countdown. "The countdown has been initiated, Evil Queen. Convoy is not in the zone yet."

"There's an idiot in the field who's going to blow the charges," Regina snaps.

She can still hear the music blasting while she types on her laptop, stopping the countdown.

_Don't need nothin' but a good time_

_How can I resist_

_Ain't lookin for nothin' but a good time_

_And it don't get better than this_

Emma jumps out of the ATV as the song ends, doing air guitar in time with the final note of the song as Regina picks up her binoculars in time to see the end of the show and groans. "Ugh. Civilians." Turning to check the distance from the convoy to her cover she misses Emma reaching in the back seat to retrieve her G-40. When Regina refocuses her attention on the 'civilian', her binoculars pick up a weapon scan and highlight the grenade launcher in red on her digital display. "I'm picking up a weapon signature! Shit, not a civilian," she yells to Kathryn over the ear piece before picking up a long range rifle from behind her and pointing it at the chest of her new target. "Asshole."

She fires one perfect shot to the chest and Emma drops to the ground groaning. The DEA caravan crosses into the green and alerts start sounding on Regina's laptop, stealing her attention away before she can see Emma sit up and clutch the point of entry.

"Countdown is initiated," Kathryn informs Regina while Emma stands up, flicking the bullet off the bullet proof vest she was luckily wearing under her t-shirt.

Emma turns around and rips the goggles off her face, releasing the bun she had twisted her long blonde hair into. She shakes her head, letting her hair fly in loose curls and bends down, grabbing the G-40 from where she had dropped it when the shot had knocked her flat on her back. She takes a knee and spins around, the sight against her eye to locate her target and the base of the launcher draped across her shoulder for stability.

"Let's see if we can't get a tune out of this old trombone," she mutters to herself before locking onto her target, the abandoned building on the cliff up ahead where the shot had come from. She fires off a grenade, thinking as it blasts out in a loud explosion that she probably should have remembered to put in ear plugs before she retaliated. "You should _so_ not be allowed to buy these things."

Regina's laptop beeps with a self destruct signal after Kathryn warns her to abort mission. The charges she had planted go off and the computer dies. The DEA convoy isn't in the proper position to be impacted by the explosives and the cars skid to a stop before changing direction and immediately fleeing.

Emma turns at the sound of a motorcycle engine and sees a lone figure speeding off on a dirtbike. She kicks the side of the ATV and yells in frustration before hiking up the side of the cliff, looking through the rubble for any valuable information her shooter might have left behind.

She sifts through some debris before finding a charred laptop. The screen is warped from the heat of the explosion, it's missing keys from the keyboard, the disc drive is stuck open, but it ends up being the only sign of another person being out there that she finds. 

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Emma and August sit together at the counter of a diner.

"I think I got ID'd on that hit," she mumbles around her breakfast. "You ever been ID'd on a hit?"

"Not that I'm aware of, no."

"Right," Emma's head bobs in agreement as her mind races. "I'm in trouble."

"You get a good look at him?"

She shrugs nonchalantly, "Little thing. Buck ten, buck fifteen tops."

"Maybe he's Filipino."

Emma takes a deep breath and shoves another bite in her mouth before finally admitting, "I'm not even sure it was a him."

August laughs, choking on his sip of coffee. "Are you saying you got your ass kicked by some girl?"

"Hey," Emma glares at him and points her fork in his face. "I'm a girl too."

"Yeah, but not just _some_ girl. You're the White Knight," he smirks, taunting her.

"I don't think this is just some girl either, August. She was a real pro."

"Are you sure you're not just saying that because she made you look like a little bitch?"

"Fuck you."

August laughs again before holding out his hands, content to lay off her for now. "Okay, okay. On the bright side, it shouldn't be that difficult to determine who it was. I mean, how many other chicks are hitters out there?" The waittress wanders over then, shamelessly flirting when she asks if they want any dessert and August shamelessly flirts back. "What do you have, honey?"

"Ice cream. Delicious."

"What flavors?" August asks for the both of them since Emma continues to blankly stare ahead as she shovels the remainder of her food in her mouth.

"Chocolate and vanilla."

"I don't like either of those. But mixed together," he teases, "that could be a nice little dish. You know what I mean? And not just the little pink spoon, I want the whole sundae." He winks at her and she smiles in response.

"That can be arranged."

"Perfect." He waits until she leaves to elbow Emma, "'Could be arranged.' You hear that? I'd like to have her kick my ass, know what I mean?" When Emma shows no sign of amusement or even acknowledging his shenanigans he shifts back to the conversation clearly still on her mind. "Any other details besides her weight class?"

"Laptop."

"Sorry? You're in a whole zone right now."

"Laptop."

"O-kay," he shrugs off Emma's blank stare and weird behavior. "So take the laptop to Ruby, get it checked out."

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.

"I want to know who that bitch is," Regina rages, storming through the office while Lacey tries to tend to the cut on her back. "Get me that tape," she waves her away.

"But, Regina--"

"Get me that tape!" Her cell phone rings and she checks the caller ID, ready to ignore the call until she sees who is on the other line. "The FBI secured the package. The window's closed, mother."

"I told you we couldn't afford mistakes."

"There was another player."

"We do not leave witnesses, Regina. If this player ID'd you...you know the rules. Regardless of who your mother is, you still have to play by them. You have 48 hours to clean the scene."

"Looking forward to it," Regina replies sarcastically before ending the call, knowing her mother will rip into her for not issuing a proper farewell the next time they speak, but already beyond pissed and in no mood for a lecture or disappointed tones. "Okay, people. We have a new target. Let's find out who our 'civilian' is."

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.

"Jesus," Ruby dangles the laptop by the screen between her thumb and pointer finger, not sure where to start. "What did you do to it? Put a campfire out with it?"

"Rubes, I'm not having such a great day. In fact, yesterday kinda sucked too. So I'm just hoping you can tell me who the owner of this laptop is, and if you'd leave the running commentary out as a bonus, I would be forever grateful."

Ruby chuckles, figuring Emma deserves a temporary reprieve because of the mess the owner of the laptop/charcoal briquette has gotten her into and gets to work in silence.

A few minutes tick by before her tinkering is successful, "Here we go. Upgraded RAM module." She pulls the chip out and runs the serial number. Numbers flicker across her screen as the information is sorted and loaded. "Chip's Chinese. Imported by Dynamix. Retailed by...huh." She squints at her screen and taps a few keys, "You know, I might be able to get you a billing address." She types in some more information and her screen flashes with zeros and ones as it runs the code she input before she leans back in her seat and points at the screen. "All right. No name, just an address. 570 Lexington Avenue, Suite 5003. You know the place?"

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Once Emma gets near her shooter's building her stomach drops when she realizes why the address had sounded so familiar. She slowly ambles inside to the directory in the middle of the lobby, scanning the 5000 suites on the board and stumbling back when her finger highlights the information for 5003.

**i-TEMP TECHNOLOGY STAFFING**

**REGINA SMITH, CEO**

And just like that, everything clicks.

"Holy fuckballs."

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Regina sits at her desk reviewing the digital footage from her binoculars she had electronically transferred to Kathryn during the op, watching as the 'civilian' drops to the dirt after Regina's shot, then sits up and clutches at the entry-wound. She hasn't seen the footage before as her attention had been diverted to her mark. When the 'civilian' turns around and rips goggles off, long blonde hair is revealed. Regina leans forward in her seat, transfixed by familiarity when the blonde hair gets shook out in loose curls.

"Regina," Lacey calls out from the open door to the brunette's office, phone in hand. "It's your wife." Regina's mouth drops open and she hits the rewind button on the footage, ignoring Lacey because even without seeing a face she immediately recognizes the 'civilian' having watched Emma shake her hair out like that nearly every time she steps out of the shower. "She's back early from her work trip and wants to know about dinner."

And just like that, everything clicks. 

"Tell her--" Regina looks up from her computer screen with an evil smile, "--dinner is at seven."

"Hi, Emma," Lacey's voice chirps back on the line. "She says dinner's at seven."

Emma smirks, "It always is."

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.

Emma slowly pulls in the driveway looking for suspicious activity. Ruby and August had told her not to act crazy or go in guns blazing, so she approaches this like any tactical mission. She has a target and she knows where that target is. If she acts off in any way she knows Regina will immediately notice something is going on and bolt. This is her one chance to fix things and take the bitch out.

The only problem is, the bitch is also her wife.

She backs her car into the garage beside Regina's like normal. She slips her wedding band back on like normal. But, when she slowly opens the back door and ducks her head in to survey the kitchen after creeping and skulking her way up from the garage, she realizes that she looks anything but normal.

Feeling on edge, she cautiously pulls her coat off and hangs it on the coat rack, turning back around to enter the kitchen and nearly jumping out of her skin when she notices Regina silently standing in the doorway and watching her with a glass of scotch in hand.

"Jesus fucking Christ," Emma gasps. Usually the clicking of Regina's heels alerts Emma to her wife's presence. She looks down and notices the usual foot wear is missing, making Regina much shorter and apparently much quieter.

"Oh, I'm sorry. Did I startle you, darling?"

"A little," Emma answers honestly with a nervous chuckle.

"It's 7:00," Regina smiles innocently. "Perfect timing, darling."

"As always," Emma smiles, then reaches out to take the glass of scotch from Regina. "This is a nice surprise."

"I hope so. You're home early."

"I missed you."

Her evil smile doesn't reach her eyes and Emma can almost _hear_ diabolical cackling when Regina, too roughly to be considered affectionate, pats her on the cheek, "I missed you, too."

"Hmm," Emma hums, silently appraising her wife as the brunette drops her hand in order to cross her arms over her chest and do the same quiet assessment.

They stare at each other for a moment, not the stare of loving spouses who have been separated during a business trip, the stare of cat and mouse, leaving Emma hoping that for once in her marriage she is the cat.

"Shall we?" Regina finally breaks the silence, gesturing towards the dining room.

Before Emma can turn and follow she notices a jug of Drano sitting on the kitchen counter and gulps, frozen in place imagining a lethal poisoning in her immediate future. She pulls the collar of her sweater away from her neck and tries to shake off the feeling of apprehension, slowly trudging behind and when Regina gestures for her to take a seat she notices the fine china on the table.

"I thought you only brought these out for special occassions."

"This _is_ a special occasion, dear," Regina's voice drips with too-sweet fakeness. 

Emma tilts her head and studies her again, not buying the act for one minute. 

Regina nods with a smile and motions again for the blonde to take her seat. As she passes Regina the brunette takes her glass and helps herself to a healthy sip of the blonde's scotch, winking at her as she presses the glass back into her hand.

While Regina leaves the room to grab the main course Emma tries to calm herself down and ignore the mind games, then pockets the knife left on her placemat, a small knife meant to be used with her fork and on food, not in a fist fight against her wife.

Regina reappears and Emma gives her a bright, hopefully innocent smile, "Mm. Lasagna, my favorite." She shifts nervously in her seat when Regina pulls out a very large knife to cut their servings before jumping up to take the knife out of Regina's hands, "Here. Let me do it, babe. You've been on your feet all day."

"Thank you," Regina smiles, then walks around the table and pulls an even _bigger_ knife out from under her apron and begins slicing the garlic bread. They serve each other and place the knives down strategically within grabbing distance.

"So, how's work?"

"Actually," Regina chuckles mirthlessly, "we had a little trouble with a commission."

"Is that right?"

"Mhm. Double booking with another firm."

Emma's lips curve up of their own accord, tilting into a small smile she's unable to bite back. If this was happening to anyone else she would have been laughing.

"Well, I hope everything worked out okay."

"It hasn't yet...but it will. I hope you're enjoy your dinner, by the way. I know it's your favorite."

Emma smirks knowingly at the way Regina is smiling at her, looking like a sweet angelic little thing. _Angels don't shoot people with long range rifles. Nice try, she-devil._

With that thought alone Emma can't resist asking once more, just for old time's sake, "Babe, could you pass the salt?"

When Regina motions for Emma to look down she notices her wife had placed the shaker right in front of her plate when she set the table and Emma can't hold the laughter in after that. With an impish smile she picks it up and shakes it over her food, maintaining eye contact with Regina from across the table. The brunette sits quietly, studying the blonde and looking completely calm with her chin resting atop her folded hands. Emma takes a big bite only after Regina takes a small dainty one, then realizes she is eating the lasagna and Regina is eating her side salad. She tugs on the collar of her sweater, once again having paranoid visions of herself being poisoned after noting a different taste to the meal. "Try something new?"

"Red pepper flakes. Gives it a little kick that's to die for."

"Mm." Emma tugs on her collar again, feeling herself breaking out in a nervous sweat, and reaches for her glass of water to wash down the bite she hadn't yet swallowed, pausing before it can touch her lips and picking up her scotch instead, rationalizing that Regina wouldn't ingest poison just to bluff her out.

"How was your dam project?"

"Had a few problems ourselves," she coughs a little and clears her throat. "Some figures didn't add up."

"Big deal?"

"Life or death," she flippantly mutters before standing, deciding the game has gone on long enough and it's time to call Regina out. "Wine?"

She picks up Regina's wine glass and gives her a healthy serving, but remains standing at the brunette's side after passing the glass back. Without warning, she drops the wine bottle and Regina reflexively reaches out and grabs it before it can hit the floor.

Emma's eyes widen and she meets Regina's curious gaze before they realize simultaneously that the jig is up. Regina drops the bottle and lets it spill the remaining contents on the rug as they both make their way in separate directions, rushing off with excuses to get something to clean the mess with.

Emma ducks into the den, quickly emerging with a gun that has a silencer screwed into the muzzle. She looks around the corner before sneaking back into the dining room.

"Gina? Babe?" She sees lights bouncing off the walls, then hears tires squealing and when she looks out the window she can see Regina peeling away. She runs out the front door and starts cutting across her neighbors' yards, trying to catch up with Regina's speeding car. "Regina!"

Regina shakes her head at herself as the tears in her eyes begin to fall, "How could I be so _stupid_?"

"Regina!" Emma yells out, attempting to jump a fence to finally cut Regina's escape off when one of the wooden slats gives out and cracks in the middle. Her arm falls through and she accidentally squeezes the trigger on her gun, firing off a shot. "Oh dear god," she mutters when she hears the sound of slamming breaks. She pulls her arm back through the hole in the fence and looks down the street where Regina's car is parked in the middle of the road, a bullet hole in the middle of her windshield. She hauls herself over the fence and walks to the middle of the street, facing her now glaring wife and holding her hands in the air. "Regina--" she starts to explain when the brunette revs her engine. "Wait! No! No, no, no. Accident! Babe? That was an accident." Regina stomps down on the gas and Emma points at her, "Regina, stop the car now. Regina?" Regina doesn't stop the car, she doesn't slow down, she hits Emma and watches as the blonde rolls up the windshield and onto the roof. "You're overreacting!" Regina starts swerving, trying to throw Emma off. "Let's not get carried away, we don't want to go to sleep angry. Pull over."

"Fuck you," Regina yells, looking up and seeing Emma through her moonroof. She punches the glass, not hard enough to break it, just hard enough to hurt her own hand and get her point across to her wife that there is no fucking way she's pulling over.

"Now, look--" Emma swings her legs over the side of the roof and kicks in the rear window behind Regina, swinging her body into the back seat, "--we need to talk!"

Apparently, Regina disagrees, because she opens the driver's door and rolls out, letting her car drive off the road and crash somewhere in the woods, Emma with a startled expression left sitting in the back seat. 

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"Okay, I'm coming! Who is it?" Ruby yells at whoever has the nerve to be banging on her door and turns all the deadbolts, unlocking the door and yanking it open, ready to tear into the unannounced visitor before noting who exactly it is and wincing when it looks like maybe somebody already had. "What the hell happened to you?!"

"My wife," Emma grumbles darkly. 

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	3. Agreeable Symmetry

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Ruby calls August to join them and the two sit together in the kitchen while Emma paces around them.

"She tried to kill me!"

"Yes, she did," August nods his head vehemently. "And you know what? Tamara tried to kill me," he waves off Emma's glare. "Not with a car. At least Regina was a man about it. At least she was upfront about it. But they all try to kill you. Slowly, painfully, cripplingly. And then, wham! They hurt you. You know how hurt I used to be over her? I used to beat myself up. Now I'm great. I got dates all the time. I was just at a thing, I was in my robe."

Ruby rolls her eyes, "You live with your dad."

"I choose to! And remind me, Ruby. Granny is where exactly? Downstairs, right? Because you live with her. And why is that, again? Because she's the only woman you've ever trusted. Right? Why? Because women are the worst."

Emma and Ruby both glare at him before the blonde shakes her head and sighs, "It's just unbelievable."

"I know exactly what you're thinking," August adds after a moment with a scratch of his beard. "If she lied about that, what else has she lied about?"

"He's got a point, Em. I mean, her job is to spy. To get information from people."

"French Riviera...a yacht...an Iranian prince. She's supposed to get close to him and gain his trust," August says the last word with a wink, then shakes his head. "It's disgusting."

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"WHAT?" The news leaves Kathryn dumbfounded. "Your wife is the 'civilian'? That's impossible!"

The brunette in front of her quickly downs another shot before turning to the blonde with an unimpressed look, "Really?"

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"This was probably planned from the beginning, Operation Stakeout Emma. A six year stakeout to get information from you. Well, mission accomplished."

"That's probably not helping," Ruby smacks the back of August's head and hands Emma a beer.

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"Okay," Kathryn takes a deep breath. "The upside is...you don't love her."

Regina downs another shot, "No."

"So, you'll kill her--and nobody's better at that than you are--and then it will be over."

Regina refills her shot glass, stares at the bottle in her hands, and wonders why the thought of 'over' isn't providing her with any comfort.

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"I'm just saying, it's like the first 150 pages of a book have been written. In the first 150 pages, Emma's been a clown. Well," August shrugs, "you can write the last 10 pages. You've been smoked but you can write the last 10, know what I'm saying?" Emma nods wordlessly and wanders out of the kitchen, "Great talk, Em. We should do it more often. It was great, I'm proud of you."

Emma pops back in the room holding a shotgun, "I'm gonna borrow this."

Ruby laughs, "I like where your head's at."

"I'll do it in the morning."

"That would probably be best."

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Kathryn checks on Regina once more before leaving, "You okay?"

"Yeah," she mumbles face down on the couch in her office as the bottle of liquor hangs loosely from her fingertips.

"Okay. Goodnight."

"Night," Regina mumbles back. Once she hears the door close and knows she is alone she lets the tears fall freely. "You don't love her," she spits out, trying desperately to convince herself.

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Regina follows Kathryn, Lacey, and an intel team from the Queen of Heart's Royal Guard into her house. The large black cup of coffee she's nursing isn't helping with the hangover headache anymore than the large black sunglasses she's wearing. She can hear Kathryn giving orders when she walks in the open door.

"...pocket litter, receipts, matchbooks. You know the drill."

After she sees one member of the guard cut open the stuffed bear she had won on her first date with Emma, pulling out the stuffing to search for a wire, and another three reviewing the tape from her wedding ceremony, Regina decides to get some fresh air and step outside. Of course, that's when Mary Margaret notices her.

"Howdy, neighbor!" she waves and Regina has to fight the urge to roll her eyes. "What's going on over here?"

Regina looks back at the guards now moving boxes of confiscated materials back to the i-Temp van they had arrived in.

"Just getting a jump on a remodel project before Emma gets here," Regina says with a large, fake smile plastered on her face.

"Wow! That's so sweet, Regina. I'm sure she'll be surprised."

"I hope so," Regina smirks back evilly.

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Emma ushers David through the front door for a tour of the house. He doesn't need to know she's using him as a human shield in case Regina is still there waiting to ambush her. What he doesn't know won't kill him. Well, maybe, technically it might.

"Wow! I can't believe I've never been over here before. This is great."

"Start with the living room," Emma suggests, steering him ahead with a hand on his shoulder.

"Oh, nice floors. Are they teak or something?"

"Red oak, David. Red oak."

She directs him to the den where he notices a small trophy, "And you won the neighborhood block party softball tournament MVP award this year...again."

Emma chuckles along with him, still keeping a wary eye out for a trap, " _Again_. That'll be sitting on your mantel next year."

She lets him wander around freely before sneaking out the back door, heading straight for the storage shed and the hatch hidden in the floor under her Bug.

When she walks down the stairs there's nothing to take a silent inventory of, the entire thing has been cleaned out. All the money, weapons, ammunition, explosives--all of it--gone. With how thoroughly it's been wiped she's honestly surprised Regina left the lightbulb dangling overhead.

"Bitch," she mutters quitely to herself and walks back up the stairs, closing the hatch door and then her eyes, taking a deep breath, and silently counting to ten. She's on her 4th round of 10's, trying to mange her anger, when she gives up and kicks one of the doors on her Bug in frustration.

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"Target profile is our main priority. Utilize all means necessary. Phone taps, credit cards, audio scan civilian frequencies--"

"With what, Regina?" Kathryn interrupts.

The brunette simply reaches across the conference room table and pushes the button on her answering machine where it sits bagged up. Emma's voice warbles out on a recording, "You've reached the Smiths. We can't take your call, but leave a message after the tone and we'll get back to you."

"And search the database."

"For what? Emma _Smith_."

"Just find her."

Lacey looks up from her computer, "Regina?"

"What?" Regina snaps.

"I think I found her."

"Where?"

"Here," she says simply, pointing to her screen where red lights are now flashing.

"Heat sensor breach in the perimeter," an automated voice warns them and an alarm starts to ring out a shrill sound. "Commence scanning all floors."

Just then, the phone rings. Regina knows immediately who's on the other line. She picks up the call on speaker phone, not bothering to look at the caller ID.

"I thought I told you not to bother me at the office, darling."

"Well, you _are_ still Mrs. Smith."

"So are a lot of girls," Regina snarks back and Emma chuckles.

"Careful, babe. I can push the button any time, anywhere."

"My dear, you couldn't find the button with both hands and a map."

Emma shakes her head, not willing to take the bait, "Last warning. You need to disappear."

"No."

"Now."

"D Sector clear," the automated voice chirps in the background.

"You expect me to roll over and play dead?"

"Should be used to it after five years of marriage."

"Six, and I'm not leaving."

"E Sector clear."

"Uh huh," Emma drawls. "Anywhere, any time."

"Intruder detected."

"Evacuate Plan C," Regina orders her staff before typing in a code to wipe all the hard drives and systems.

"Evacuation in progress. Evacuation in progress. Evacuation in progress..." the automated voice drones.

As everyone moves quickly around the room shredding important documents, wiping computers, and setting up their escape, Emma crawls through the air ducts above. When she kicks open a vent and drops to the floor behind them she sees Kathryn and Lacey firing harpoons into the building across the street through broken windows and then jump out to zip line over. Regina looks over her shoulder, makes eye contact with Emma, winks, and then does the same. Emma runs to the open window to watch as Regina lands with a running finish.

"Chickenshit!" Emma screams at her.

"Pussy!" Regina screams back.

Emma glares, Regina smirks, and they both think _god damn it, this is going to be harder than I thought._

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Emma returns to Ruby's house to pick through the remains of the shredder she found in Regina's office and tonight Ruby is the one pacing and holding the shotgun.

"You're telling me that you had a shot at her and you didn't take it? We've got all this stuff here," she motions to the numerous weapons spread out over random surfaces, "and you're trying to tell me you couldn't take her out? Well, now she's a problem for both of us. Now my house is priority one."

"Just gimme a hand, will you?"

"You're driving me crazy with the magnifying glass and the tongs and the shredder. You're like an insane person." Emma ignores her and continues to use the tongs to pick out pieces of paper, one by one, and the magnifying glass to examine them, so Ruby continues ranting. "All right. They gave you 48 hours, right? What have we got left here? 23? 22?"

"18 and change."

"You've got 18 hours until Gold closes the book on you?"

"Ruby?" Granny calls out and Ruby startles, pumping the shotgun and holding it in position to fire.

"Granny!" she screams, "We're on high alert here! I almost killed you right then, you do not even realize!"

"Never mind."

"I am so done playing games with this broad. You gotta take this bitch out head-on."

Emma points the tongs at Ruby, "Don't tell me how to handle my wife."

"She's not your wife, she's the enemy. She could be outside right now!"

"Rubes?" Emma holds up a piece of paper with the tongs, "I think I've got it."

Ruby takes the paper and examines it. They both recognize the logo.

"Forrest Property Management? Now we're talking."

Emma grins, "So tomorrow I call, claiming to be from i-Temp, and see where they're setting up shop. They evacuated the old office and now I have the connection to find the new address."

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Emma uses construction equipment from her office to sneak into the building where Regina's new penthouse is being renovated. She's standing under the camera of an elevator when it slams to a stop. The speaker overhead crackles to life with a distorted robotic voice.

"This is security. There's a problem with your elevator, ma'am. Do you want engineering to come up and see what the problem is?"

Emma shrugs, "Take your time, I'm really quite comfortable."

"Are you _really_ comfortable?"

Emma chuckles, "Regina? Is that you, babe?"

"First and last warning, Emma. Get out of town."

Emma can hear the smirk in her wife's voice now that she's removed the voice modifier. She turns to face the camera head-on, her hands on her hips.

"You know I'm not going anywhere."

"Well, so you say. But right now you're trapped in a steel box hanging 70 floors over nothing but air."

"Oh, so this is a trap?" Emma drawls sarcastically.

"She's in car 3," Lacey whispers.

"It's never gonna work, babe. It's never gonna work because you _constantly_ underestimate me."

"Do I?"

"You have no idea who I am. You have no idea what I'm capable of."

"Well, back at you, darling," Regina purrs.

"Let me guess. Shaped charge on the counterbalance cable, two more on the primary and secondary brakes? Maybe?"

"She found them," Lacey whispers in a panic.

"Yes, thank you," Regina glares at her. Turning her attention back to the video feed of Emma in the elevator she asks condescendingly, "Did you also get the base charge on the principle cable?" Emma looks around nervously and bites her lip. "Promise to leave town, or I'll blow it."

"Okay," Emma shuffles nervously and kicks the ground with the toe of her boot. "I give up. Blow it."

Regina's eyebrows shoot up in genuine surprise, "What?"

"Go on," Emma challenges her with a daring tone, "blow it."

"You think I won't?"

Emma looks directly in the camera with a smug, confident smirk on her lips, "I think you won't."

"Okay," Regina chuckles. "Five, four.... Any last words?"

"The new curtains are hideous."

"Goodbye, Emma." A bomb goes off and an elevator explodes. The live video feed cuts out and Regina looks at where Kathryn has her finger on the detonator. "What the hell was that?!"

"What? You said goodbye."

They hear the elevator crash after falling all 70 floors. If anyone managed to survive the explosion they definitely wouldn't have survived that fall.

Emma shakes her head in disbelief before exiting car 4. She had hacked into the system and swapped the video feeds so Regina would think she was in car 3 at Ruby's insistence, honestly unable to believe Regina would try to blow her up.

She didn't believe they had come to this. She didn't want to finish it. But now, she was determined to.

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Regina sits alone at a table for two in the fancy restaurant where Emma had proposed. She's in a short black dress sipping a glass of champagne while a tear rolls down her cheek. She closes her eyes and tries to think of anything other than Emma and wipes the tear away. A hand closes over hers and tilts the glass she's holding, refilling her drink. If she couldn't see the burgundy leather in her peripheral vision she would know who it was anyway by the gentle touch alone.

"I thought of a number of lines for this moment." Emma's tone is soft and quiet, Regina knows it's the tone she uses when she's hurt. "Thought I'd just _drop_ in. Hey, doll. Thanks for giving me the _shaft_."

"Nicely done," Regina chuckles, fighting off a sob of relief knowing the blonde is still alive. "So what did you decide?"

Emma gives her a pained smile, "I want a divorce."

"I like it. You proposed to me here, so it has agreeable symmetry."

"May I sit?"

"No."

When Emma sits anyway a waiter approaches, asking if she'd like champagne as well.

"No, champagne's for celebrating. I'll have a martini."

Once they're alone again Emma watches Regina lean back in her chair and pull the gun from her purse onto her lap, calmly covering it with her napkin. The blonde shakes her napkin out as a distraction and reaches for the gun on the shoulder holster under her leather jacket, also moving it to her lap and coolly hiding it under her own napkin. They stare at each other in silence until the waiter returns, placing the drink in front of Emma.

"You're not in the proper attire for this establishment," Regina says, her voice thick with disdain to hide attraction. Emma is wearing black knee-high boots, black jeans, a black sweater, and the dark burgundy leather jacket Regina first noticed. Emma prefers her favorite red jacket but Regina is fond of this one and she's sure the blonde wore it tonight for that reason. "I'm surprised they let you in."

"I like the dress," Emma replies sweetly, motioning towards Regina's outfit and ignoring the brunette's barb.

"I'm in mourning," Regina snarks. The black did seem apropos after the incident earlier with the elevator.

Emma ignores the sass, "You should wear it more often."

The brunette leans forward, "What do you want, Emma?"

"We have an unusual problem, Regina. You obviously want me dead and I'm less and less concerned of your well-being. So what do we do? Shoot it out here, hope for the best?"

"Well, that would be a shame, because they would probably ask me to leave once _you're_ dead."

Emma ignores her wife's condescending smirk and extends her hand, "Dance with me."

Regina lifts an eyebrow, "You don't dance."

"That was just part of my cover, babe."

She stands and wiggles her fingers. Regina eyes her suspiciously but stands as well, taking her hand and allowing Emma to pull her onto the dance floor.

"Was sloth part of it too?"

Emma squeezes her fingers tightly in response and Regina huffs and yanks her hand away. She pulls the brunette close to her body, chest to chest and they sway to the music. Regina's arms drape over Emma's shoulders while Emma's arms wrap around Regina's waist and her fingers interlock on the small of the brunette's back.

"You think this story's gonna have a happy ending?"

"Happy endings are just stories that haven't finished yet." Emma moves her hands to gently squeeze Regina's hips and moves her back to a glass column, slamming the brunette into it. She can hear the glass cracking and sees Regina wince in pain. When her eyes open she glares at the blonde and then they start dancing again like nothing happened. When Emma dips Regina she runs her hands over her wife's body, subtly patting her down for weapons and Regina scoffs, "Satisfied?"

"Not for years."

She runs her hand up Regina's bare thigh and feels a knife tucked into a garter. She pulls it out of its casing and throws it across the room, impaling it in the wooden wall. Regina drops low and runs her hands down Emma's legs, patting her down as well. She immediately finds a knife tucked into her boot and does the same as her wife had, throwing it and impaling it in the wall next to her own blade.

When she drags her hands up Emma's thighs the blonde is suddenly glad she has a black tank top under her black sweater because her wife's touch is giving her chills. This might be a dance to disguise a pat down, but she can't remember the last time she's been touched like this. Regina's hands dip inside Emma's jacket and all she finds there is an empty shoulder holster, the gun left under the napkin at the table.

When her hands continue to wander and Emma feels like she can't take anymore of this delicious torture _and_ keep a level head, she grabs Regina's wrists and pulls her wife's arms up so they can drape over her shoulders again, back where they'd originally started.

"Why is it you think we failed?" Regina wonders curiously, "Because we were leading separate lives? Or was it all the lying that did us in?"

"I have a theory," Emma leans in, speaking softly and resting her forehead against Regina's. "Newly formed."

"I'm breathless to hear it."

"You killed us."

Regina rolls her eyes, "Provocative."

"You approached our marriage like a job. Something to be reconned, planned, and executed."

Regina looks up then, fire in her eyes, "And you avoided it."

"What do you care, if I was just a cover?"

"Well, who said you were just a cover?"

They've stopped moving and are staring deep into each other's eyes, a breath apart.

"Wasn't I?"

"Wasn't _I_?"

When Emma's gaze drops to Regina's lips, then back to her eyes Regina drops her arms from around Emma's neck and pulls away from her.

"Regina--"

"I have to..." Regina turns and bolts for the stairs, wiping at her eyes as she climbs them, "Excuse me."

"No exits up there, babe," Emma calls out loudly, sure this is a diversion. Seeing Regina cry pulls at her heartstrings though and she's fighting the urge to chase after her. "Be cold, Emma," she mutters to herself, "She's a liar. Be super cold."

Two women run out of the restroom upstairs and then Emma's worried glance turns into an amused grin when an explosion goes off. She loses sight of Regina in the mayhem of guests and staff pushing their way down the stairs towards the exit. She finally catches sight of her walking out the door and runs to catch up but sees no sign of her once she reaches the sidewalk.

An old man walking by tells her that she's ticking and she freezes, suddenly able to feel the subtle weight of an explosive in the inner pocket of her leather jacket. She pulls it out and quickly drops it down the slot of a mail box and walks a few feet away before it explodes.

A driver rolls down his window as she walks by, "Limo, ma'am?"

She reaches in, grabs him by the back of the neck and slams his head into the steering wheel. He passes out and she opens the door, pulls him out, and steals his ride.

Racing onto the interstate she calls Regina's cell phone. When it rings the brunette pushes the green button on her steering wheel, activating the bluetooth, and answers calmly. "Regina Smith."

"That's the second time you've tried to kill me."

"Oh, come on. It was just a little bomb."

"I want you to know I'm going home to burn everything I ever bought you."

"I'll race you there, darling." She pushes the red button on her steering wheel, ending the call. Since Emma is as stubborn as she is, there's no surprise when the phone immediately starts ringing again. "You there yet?"

"First time we met, what was your first thought?"

"You tell me."

"I thought--" Emma struggles to find the words. There's no way she can explain love at first sight. "I thought you looked like Christmas morning. I don't know how else to say it."

"And why are you telling me this now?"

"I guess in the end you start thinking about the beginning. So there it is. I thought you should know." Emma pauses a moment before asking again, "So how about it, Regina? Hmm?"

"I thought--" Regina hits her head on the headrest, struggling to stay detached. _Love is weakness_. "I thought you were the most beautiful mark I'd ever seen."

Emma sighs in defeat, "So it was all business, yeah?"

"All business."

"From the go."

"Cold, hard math."

"Thank you. That's what I needed to know."

**CALL DISCONNECTED**

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	4. Explosions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: the infamous fight sequence

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Just as Emma starts to pull in the driveway to her home Regina pushes down on the gas pedal in the Mercedes and crashes right into the passenger door of the blonde's stolen car.

"Ahh!" Emma yells with a scowl as Regina backs up. Her busted front bumper drags along the driveway with a loud screech as she speeds away, not without further clipping the stolen car in the process of pushing it out of the way to head up the driveway. 

Emma puts the car in reverse and tries to back up and follow the same movement forward but the car is badly damaged and the twisted metal is stuck on the curb so it jerks to a stop, one-third in the driveway, one-third in the shrubbery lining the yard, and one-third hanging into the street. She shakes the steering wheel with a grunt of frustration and jumps out of the car, running to the front door in a crouched sprint. She turns the door handle, further frustrated when she realizes it's locked, and hears David call out to her.

"Hey, Emma!"

She jiggles the handle and pushes on the door with her shoulder before tossing a distracted and now furious glance back at her neighbor, dressed in sweats, out on a jog and sending her a friendly wave in greeting.

"Hey, David," she grumbles.

"Are you all right?"

She ducks down and creeps behind the bushes, quickly stealing glances in the windows lining the front of her property, looking for any signs of movement inside.

"Yeah."

"Okay..." He let his words drift off, confused by Emma's odd behavior as she has now started trying to open every window, all of which, as usual, locked as well. "Umm, by the way, your car is hanging out over the...sidewalk here."

"Yeah," Emma starts jogging around the house, waving the man away. "Thanks, David."

"O-kay. Have a good night."

"'Night," Emma yells back, already moving out of sight.

She hides behind the hedge as she runs up the driveway and notices Regina's car parked awkwardly in front of the garage, the driver's door left wide open. She quickly makes her way to the storage shed, grabs a hammer to use as a weapon, and slips out. A tree in the backyard provides cover when Regina opens the back door and glances around the yard, shotgun in hand. Once deeming the area clear she moves back inside the house, locking the door behind her.

Emma glares at her wife's retreating form and races across the yard, awkwardly diving behind another bush and rolling into a dark corner, not without several pained and muffled grumbles of some rather colorful profanities.

Scrambling up she keeps her back to the fence and makes a mad dash for the basement doors, sliding past the patio light like she's coming in to home plate for a home run. The basement was also, as usual, locked and she momentarily seethes before noticing the trellis and vines wrapped around this side of the house. Feeling a burst of inspiration she climbs the trellis and comes face-to-face with the den. She knocks her elbow and forearm through the glass, breaking the window as quietly as possible and unlocking it, slipping in the room undetected.

She leaves the hammer on the desk in favor of a gun and silencer she's relieved and a little bit smug to find Regina hadn't uncovered and confiscated during her raid. Holding the gun steady she creeps around the dark house listening for movement.

When she reaches the bottom of the stairs she picks up a picture frame and holds it around the corner, trying to use the reflection in the glass to spot Regina. Regina spots the reflection first though and from her position at the top of the stairs she fires off a shot which blasts a hole in the wall directly over the top of Emma's crouched form. Emma jumps and ducks lower as Regina continues firing a row of shots at the wall she's still using for cover.

When the last empty shell casing hits the floor Regina calls out in a condescending tone, "Are you still alive, dear?"

Emma groans like she's been hit and drags her gun around on the ground before jumping up and sticking her hand through one of the holes in the wall Regina had just created, returning fire.

The brunette ducks out of the way and rolls down the stairs, returning fire as Emma calmly moves away and reloads. They meet on opposing sides of the long hall and exchange fire before ducking behind different doorways.

Regina takes a deep breath and stands up, a shotgun in one hand and an automatic rifle in the other, starting a large sweep of the house. On the other side of the wall, Emma looks for her as well.

The White Knight is a professional killer, but Emma Smith is a clumsy idiot and her elbow knocks against a vase. She scrambles to catch it but mostly just bats it further away. When the glass hits the floor and shatters she cringes and Regina smirks. 

The brunette fires where the glass had hit, assuming that's where Emma is standing as the blonde runs off in the opposite direction, glad that while she wasn't able to save the vase and her position of cover she _was_ able to throw Regina off long enough to escape.

Regina hears the pounding footsteps as Emma runs and turns, firing in that direction. Emma slides on her back into the kitchen, returning fire as Regina ducks out of the way. She pulls open the door of the refrigerator as Regina's shots resume, trying to deflect them as she crouches down and crawls behind the island in the middle of the kitchen. She yanks open a drawer and pulls out a butcher knife, hurling it in Regina's direction and impaling it on the wall next to her wife's head.

"Your aim's as bad as your cooking, babe," she yells out as she pulls a gas line loose. "And that's saying something!"

Regina scowls and reloads her rifle then swings around and starts firing again, the shots immediately causing an explosion thanks to the open gas line which knocks her down, "Shit."

Emma jumps out of the kitchen, surrounded by flames. She lands a flying kick to Regina's abdomen as the brunette starts to stand up, knocking her into the wall behind them. Emma brings her knee up, hitting Regina in the stomach and causing the brunette to double over with a grunt. Just as the blonde swings her arm to bring a heavy elbow to the side of her wife's head Regina side-steps and ducks, bringing her own elbow cracking against Emma's ribs. She stands and pushes Emma, messily knocking everything off the counter they pass with the blonde's body.

Emma starts to push up off her knees and shake her head to clear it when Regina swings a lamp, ready to crack it over her head. The blonde brings her arms up defensively and easily blocks the swing, letting the glass break on her leather covered forearm and grabbing a surprised Regina.

She has both hands tightly fisted around the straps of the brunette's dress and uses them to yank her from side to side, roughly slamming her body against both sides of the hallway. Regina is dazed when they reach the end of it and Emma takes the opportunity to throw her over the dining room table as they approach it, the brunette's body slides over the tabletop and hits a chair, knocking it down, and she lands next to it in a crumpled heap.

Emma strolls around the table, staring at Regina on the floor with a predatory glint in her eye. Charming, clumsy Emma Smith is officially tapped out and the White Knight is here to play, bringing out a swagger in the blonde, all confidence that the target is about to be eliminated.

"Come on, babe," she bounces lightly on her feet, her hands in position to fight. She looks like she does in the ring with August--light on her toes, feet shoulder length apart, front leg stiff and back leg bent with her right heel raised. Her elbows are locked in, fists at the level her mouthguard would normally be, left in front of her defensively and right tucked back ready to swing. This isn't a game though, it's not a friendly training match in the ring, this is a brawl with someone trying to kill her. "Show me what you're working with," she can't help but try to rile her up, wiggling the fingers on one hand that was just tucked into a tight fist to motion the brunette over.

Regina groans and pushes herself up, grabbing the curtain rod from where it had fallen when she had landed roughly. She swings it suddenly, catching Emma off-guard and hitting her in the head. She uses the fact that Emma is now the dazed one to her advantage and wraps the curtains around her neck, choking her, then head-butting her. When the blonde starts to fall back she raises her foot and kicks Emma in the chest, knocking her back and shattering the doors of the china cabinet.

Glass rains down on the blonde as she falls to the ground and Regina smirks, "Why don't you show me what _you're_ working with, darling?"

Emma grumbles, slipping on glass as she scrambles to chase after Regina who suddenly runs out of the room. Just as the brunette reaches down to grab her shotgun Emma runs in the room and tackles her, sending the gun sliding away across the floor.

They land in a heap and Regina rolls on top of her, straddling the blonde's waist. She grabs the collar of Emma's sweater with her left hand and uses it to yank the blonde up, then violently slam her back down against the ground, swinging at her with her right fist in the process. She lands two good punches but on the third swing of her arm Emma catches her with a hand around her bicep and flips Regina on her back, then presses her forearm down against the brunette's throat to choke her.

Regina's hands shoot out, scratching and pushing wildly before she manages to grab a handful of blonde wavy hair. She immediately yanks down, making Emma's head hit the floor beside her own. While Emma's head is down Regina snakes her arm out and wraps it around the blonde's throat in a chokehold.

Emma chokes momentarily, but luckily for her that particular move had been August's go-to for submission in the ring and she was skilled at getting out of it (most of the time). She rears back on her knees and stands quickly, leaving Regina with no choice but to keep holding on to Emma's neck and wrap her legs around her waist.

Emma is still losing air so she jerks around trying to throw Regina off before stumbling and slamming her into the grandfather clock ticking away in the corner of the room, hitting her against it repeatedly until the wood breaks and the brunette's body goes limp.

She drops Regina and takes deep, gulping breaths of air while she rips her jacket off and tosses it aside, the leather now torn all over anyway. Regina's eyes momentarily cross after being slammed against yet another hard object and she shakes her head, trying to clear her mind and get her wits back.

She thinks quickly, grabbing a vase in each hand and smashes them against both sides of Emma's head before the blonde has a chance to move away, then jumps up hoping to knock Emma down.

The blonde surprises her though and catches her, punching her in the ribs. Regina brings an elbow down hard to Emma's back in response and she crumples, sending them both falling down to the ground.

She lands another good punch but as she starts to swing a second time, Emma slips away and jumps up to give the brunette a hard kick with her boot. Regina's ribs ache when she retaliates with a kick of her own which hits Emma in the chest and knocks the air from the blonde's lungs.

They both hunch over then, slightly breathless and definitely hurting, taking a moment to recover before realizing they're both just standing there gazing at each other.

They snap to attention and straighten back up into fighting stances before Regina looks to the side and Emma follows her line of sight to Regina's shotgun and Emma's pistol on the ground, just out of reach.

They look back at each other and make eye contact before diving for the guns. Regina grabs Emma's pistol and cocks back the hammer while Emma grabs Regina's shotgun and pumps a shell into the chamber.

They face each other with weapons drawn and stare each other down, panting as the seconds tick by, neither one making the first move.

Regina watches as her wife softens, she can see the moment the determination and cold focus leaves Emma's green eyes. _Love is weakness, Regina._ Her jaw tightens and she glares at Emma, then shakes her head trying to convince herself to look past this trap and pull the trigger.

Emma feels her resolve slipping, the woman in front of her, trying to kill her, not merely some target she needs to eliminate. The woman in front of her is still her wife and _fuck_ she still loves her. She lowers the shotgun.

"I can't do it," she admits quietly.

"Don't!" Regina screams, shaking her gun in front of her to remind Emma this is life or death and they both need to make a choice. "Come on!" She begs, teeth tightly clenched, shaking with rage and need. She's not entirely sure she can pull the trigger if Emma surrenders. She needs Emma to fight back so she could end this. She needs to make the kill and move on. "Come on!"

Emma shrugs apathetically, "You want the hit? It's yours."

She drops the shotgun to the floor and the tears that had gathered in Regina's eyes begin to fall. Her arm remains outstretched, pistol still pointed at Emma who is staring into Regina's brown eyes and wordlessly pouring out all the love she feels for her from her own green eyes.

When Regina chokes out a sob and closes her eyes Emma advances. She knocks the pistol from Regina's now loose grip and cups Regina's face with her hands, pulling her in close for a passionate kiss which the brunette immediately surrenders to.

Emma's hands start to wander, grazing a bare thigh and lifting it to wrap around her midsection. Regina's hips start rocking against Emma's leg and the blonde reaches down, squeezing Regina's ass firmly with both hands, giving her the silent message to lift up off both feet and wrap both legs around her waist.

She bites Regina's bottom lip, swallows her moan, and this time when she pushes Regina's back into a wall it's not in a fit of rage but in the heat of passion. Regina gasps and drops her legs after Emma sits her on the broken remains of their entertainment center, then spreads them widely, leaving room for Emma to stand between them.

Emma pushes up the bottom of Regina's short dress which was already falling at mid-thigh, intent on bunching it around her wife's hips. When the tight fabric doesn't respond as quickly as she wants it to she simply rips it open at the slit to hurry up the process.

Regina leans back against the wall from her sitting position, her palms resting against the edge of the entertainment center as she white-knuckles her grip on it while Emma kisses and sucks on her neck.

Regina needs to feel Emma close against her again so she starts tugging on Emma's sweater and the blonde raises her arms and lets her wife pull it up and over her head, tossing it aside. She jumps down and drapes her arms around Emma's neck like she had while they had been dancing and tangles her fingers in knotted blonde hair. She tugs at the wavy curls when she kisses Emma deeper and Emma moans in response and pushes her again into another wall.

Regina moans and pushes back, then launches forward and rips Emma's tank top off too. Emma lifts Regina's leg to wrap around her waist again and grinds against the brunette's center. She squeezes Regina's thigh with her left hand while her right tangles her fingers with Regina's and brings them up over her head.

"Couch," Regina pants out in a breathy moan but Emma doesn't think she'll be able to make it that far so she picks Regina up and knocks everything off the nearest available surface, setting Regina on it and pushing her down onto her back with a hand between her breasts.

She yanks the ripped dress up around Regina's hips and pulls down lace panties, throwing them over her shoulder before she bends down and spreads Regina's legs open wide, settling between them with a long lick up her wife's wet center. Regina throws her head back and moans, reaching down between her legs to grab a handful of Emma's hair so she can hold her in place.

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It's a blur after that. A lot more kissing, a lot more teeth, a lot more pushing. It's passion and lust and the fire they've both been missing between them, the fire that Emma had been so desparate to find again, but now it's infinitely better because there's nothing holding them back anymore.

When Emma makes Regina cum with her tongue the brunette feels like a weight has been lifted and when Emma's legs shake while Regina's fingers are buried deep within her she feels like she's coming home again. They make each other fall apart and they pull each other back together and neither one ever wants to let go again.

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Once the lust-filled haze has dissipated they go from fucking in every room on every available surface to making slow, sensual love. Emma is naked, sitting on the couch while an equally naked Regina straddles her lap. They're both panting and their foreheads are resting together. They share a sweet kiss and Emma hugs Regina close as they both relax in the gentle embrace.

Regina groggily pulls back just enough to look at Emma. She sees how much her wife adores her in the sparkling of her bright green eyes, "Hiya stranger."

"Hiya back."

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The sound of beeping rouses August from his sleep. He reaches out for the cell phone on his night stand, cracking one eye to review the new alert from Gold's Guild.

**REGINA MILLS A.K.A. REGINA SMITH A.K.A. THE EVIL QUEEN**

**$500,000.00**

"Tempting," he yawns and places the phone back down, muttering to himself. "But I don't get out of bed for less than a million dollars."

His phone beeps again with another new alert.

**EMMA SWAN A.K.A. EMMA SMITH A.K.A. THE WHITE KNIGHT**

**$500,000.00**

"Fuck."

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	5. Crack Addicts Got Problems, You Two Are Smoked

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They're move around the broken remains of their kitchen trying to find something for breakfast, working in complete harmony, more in sync and in love than they can ever remember. They had woken up on the couch and Emma had suggested a shower together and a game of 20 Questions to get to know each other better now that their covers were blown. It's slowly dissolved into something more like open curiosity with playful teasing and a lot of flirting.

"That left of yours," Emma laughs with a wince. "A thing of beauty."

Regina smirks, "You take it well."

"Thank you."

"That vacation in Aspen? You left early. Why."

"The Mad Hatter."

"Oh, god!" Regina chuckles, "I wanted that hit. We have history."

"What kind of history," Emma looks up from her cereal and her tone is 100% jealous.

"Nothing like that," Regina assures her while lightly scratching her back affectionately.

Emma nods in relief and wonders about a night several years before, "You didn't hear me that night the chopper dropped me off for our anniversary?"

"No," Regina remembers the night instantly. "Percussion grenades. I was partially deaf that night."

"I'm slightly color blind," Emma admits with a shrug. "Retinal scarring."

"That would explain your terrible sense of fashion," Regina teases and kisses away the frown Emma immediately sports. They go through a list of injuries they've suffered in the past and the events leading up to them before a smoke bomb is thrown through the window.

They scramble away, glad they were already awake and dressed. Emma is back in her usual blue jeans and today she has a white sweater thrown over her tank top. Regina probably isn't in the best attire for evading hit men though. She's wearing another short, tight black dress (because she liked the effect it had on Emma the night before) and black knee-high boots with a ridiculously high heel. Emma knocks down the coat rack and grabs her brown leather jacket, slipping it on and handing Regina the dark red blazer she'd left out.

They duck down below the red lasers shining through the windows, sights for the snipers waiting to take a shot, and start throwing hand signals at each other. Emma realizes how ridiculous they look arguing silently and finally just rushes across the floor, dragging Regina with her down the stairs to the basement.

"I was given 48 hours to take you out," she says, digging in a box with a model train set.

"Same."

"Jesus," she huffs, pulling out two guns and handing one to Regina. "Where's the trust?"

"What did you expect?" Regina starts to calmly explain before frowning at the weapon in her hand. "Why do I get the small gun?"

"Are you kidding me?"

"No."

Emma sighs and rolls her eyes but trades with her wife anyway. The door to the basement is opened just wide enough for a bomb to be dropped down. It rolls down the stairs and lands at Emma's feet. She kicks it across the room and it lands next to a propane tank she was supposed to have replaced with the empty one on the grill outside a week earlier. She cringes and glances at Regina who knows with that simple look that that propane tank is the full one and they need to move.

"Run!"

They take off, pushing open the doors to the back yard that Emma had tried to break in through the night before as an explosion shakes the house. They burst out the doors, turning to fire at the snipers on the roof and hit men on the ground when another explosion destroys their entire home. They get knocked down by the blast and help each other stand in the ash and rubble, the only two remaining.

"We need a car," Regina says remembering she'd smashed in her front bumper hitting Emma the night before. The stolen car is still broken and blocking the majority of the driveway making it impossible for Emma to drive the Bug out of the storage shed.

"Nolans," Emma offers immediately and the pair run off towards their neighbor's garage. She picks up a rock and throws it through the glass window, then opens the side door to the garage and climbs in the van parked inside, leaning down to hotwire it. "The guy's had my barbecue set for months. I blame him for that explosion. If I had been able to grill that full tank wouldn't have been in the basement."

Regina ignores her grumbled excuses and climbs into the passenger seat, moving the topic back to the game they were playing in the kitchen. "I was never in the Peace Corps."

"What?" Emma looks up surprised, connecting the last two wires and starting the engine. "I really liked that about you."

"Maybe this honesty thing isn't such a good idea."

"I didn't go to MIT."

"Really?"

"Notre Dame. Art History major."

Regina laughs in shock, "Art?"

"History," Emma huffs. "It's reputable."

"Okay," Regina chuckles and pushes the button to open the Nolan's garage door.

When Emma sees a man in all black lurking behind her with a gun in his hand she stomps on the gas, hitting him. She quickly switches gears from reverse to park and jumps out of the car, kicks the already stunned man, grabs his gun, jumps back in, and finishes backing down the driveway, running him over on her way out.

"Fuckers get younger every year."

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They're driving on the interstate with the radio on low in the background, listening to Air Supply's 'Making Love Out Of Nothing At All'.

"I gotta tell you...I never really liked your cooking. I'm sorry, I don't want to hurt your feelings, but it's just not your gift."

"My dear," Regina rolls her eyes, "I've never cooked a day in my life. The i-Temp girls cooked."

Emma's mouth drops open, "Web of lies!" She narrows her eyes and shakes her head, then smiles with an amused smirk on her face while she starts humming along to the music. "And I don't know how you do it," she sings off-key, bobbing her head. "Making love out of nothing at all. Making love..." She notices Regina side-eyeing her and chuckles, "I like it. Deal with it." Just then, three matching Audis pull into focus in her rear view mirror. "We got company."

"What?" Regina swivels quickly in her seat, looking out the back window. "Shit." She climbs in the back seat and pulls it down but falls to the floor when Emma yanks roughly on the steering wheel. "Emma, hold steady!"

"It's called evasive driving, babe."

"Puta mierda," she grumbles, reaching up and pushing the button to open the van's trunk. A golf bag, stroller, dry cleaned clothes, and other miscellaneous crap falls out all over the road behind them making one of the cars swerve wildly.

"In the spirit of honesty, I feel like I need to confess that I can speak Spanish."

She can see Regina's head snap up suddenly in the rear view mirror and she watches as realization and guilt washes over her. Usually the brunette only uses Spanish in front of Emma if she's irritated and bitching _about_ her. 

"So you know that I--"

"Just called me a fucking dumb ass? Yep." Regina looks stunned and Emma chuckles, "I also know when we fuck and you're completely done for because you start panting and mumbling out instructions."

Regina smacks her on the arm, "I do not!"

They're under heavy fire and Emma suddenly jerks on the wheel again making Regina fall down in the back seat.

"This thing's all over the place. How do you drive these things anyway? The transmission's terrible."

Regina reaches up and pushes the trunk button again, this time closing it, rolling her eyes as the blonde has the nerve to gripe from her position behind the driver's seat.

"Darling," she winces after another tumble in the backseat. "Let me drive."

"I got it," Emma stubbornly refuses.

"Move over," Regina snaps, her patience gone. "Move!" When Emma doesn't budge Regina starts pushing her shoulder, "I'm the suburban housewife, dear. You move."

"Fine," she pouts, quickly trading places with Regina, the van only momentarily losing speed before her wife gets situated behind the wheel. She lies down on the floor between the driver's seat and the middle row and opens the door, leaning out of the speeding van and shooting at the car behind them.

"They're bulletproof!" Regina yells, having already tried that approach.

Emma fires off a couple more shots before pulling herself back in the van and closing the door, "They're bulletproof!" Regina just rolls her eyes again as Emma once again opens the door for the trunk and shoots at the car that just rear-ended them.

After exchanging fire with the men behind them the blonde ducks behind the middle row of seats to reload her gun. "Hey, babe. I should probably also tell you, in the spirit of honesty, that...I have a kid."

"WHAT?!"

Regina slams on the breaks and the car that had just rear-ended them does so again, so hard this time that Emma's sent flying into the front seat, close enough that Regina can immediately start slapping and punching her arm and leg with her free hand while trying to focus on driving with the other.

"Are you out of your mind? What's wrong with you?" Emma yelps, holding her hands out to try and defend herself.

" _You're_ what's wrong with me," Regina replies, still slapping.

"I was young!" She holds out her hands to stop the next round of smacks so she can explain, "He lives with his dad. I don't have any contact, I just get a picture emailed to me once a year on his birthday."

"That's better. That's much better. Great," Regina snarks and resumes punching Emma as she climbs back into the back seat.

"Stop it!" Emma yells, holding up a golf club. She stands in the open trunk, balancing with one foot on the back bumper of the van and one foot on the hood of the car chasing them. One of the hitters pops up out of the other car's moonroof, gun aimed at her and she swings the club, hitting him in the head. When she notices a grenade hooked to the utility strap running across his chest she pulls the pin and dives back in the van, "Go, go, go!"

The other car explodes and apparently so has Regina. "What's the father's name and social security number?"

"No," Emma brushes off the question. "You're not gonna kill him."

"So you have a _son_?!"

"His name is Henry." Two of the cars that have been following them pull alongside the van and hit the passenger doors, sandwiching them in a loud crunch. "I had an affair with my handler when I was first approached to join the Guild. I was 18 and when I found out I was pregnant I was beyond scared to lose the life I was just starting to think of as permanent. For a foster kid like me, a permanent home is a big deal. He asked me to wait to complete training until I had the baby because he'd already been planning on going AWOL and said he'd take care of the kid when he ran off. I wasn't in any position to be a mother and I agreed." Regina swerves suddenly, pushing the car on her left into the median and driving into oncoming traffic. The last car left following them approaches again on the driver's side with a man hanging off the open passenger's window. She pushes the button to open the passenger doors and when he leaps through Emma leans back and he falls all the way out. "These doors are handy." Regina has fallen silent and Emma glances up at her from the back seat, "You know, you're being a bit hypocritical. It's not like you're some beacon of truth."

Regina frowns, knowing this is true but there's a whole lot of pain floating around right now for a whole lot of reasons. She sighs and gives in. "My father was also named Henry. I wasn't lying when I said he died but it wasn't just from a heart attack, I'm fairly certain my mother killed him. She's the Queen of Hearts."

"WHAT?!"

Regina had told her earlier that morning that she was the Evil Queen and that she worked as a member of the Queen of Hearts' Royal Guard but she failed to mention that her boss was her mother. The car is getting closer and Regina is losing her patience while Emma fires off shots not doing any effective damage.

"You got it?"

"Got it."

"Any time."

"I said I got it!"

Regina frowns at her tone and when the blonde pauses to reload her gun her wife decides to just end this fucking thing already. She stomps on the breaks and yanks on the steering wheel. The van makes a skidding stop, changing directions suddenly, and faces the car that had been pursuing them. She holds a gun out the driver's window and calmly shoots the gas tank of the Audi and sends it up in a flaming explosion. Satisfied the issue has been dealt with, Regina drives away from the scene while Emma climbs back into the passenger's seat.

When she fixes Regina with an expectant stare the brunette merely rolls her eyes, "You were taking too long."

Emma huffs and they both fall silently before Emma sighs. "We're gonna have to redo every conversation we've ever had," she says solemnly, turning off the radio.

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"This is disgusting," August pushes his plate back, bitching at a waittress who passes him. He's sitting at a table at the same diner where he had breakfast with Emma the day after her botched mission. "How could you serve this? Ma'am, is it possible to get this reheated? Miss? Miss, I'm talking to you. Excuse me?" He sighs and turns around, coming face-to-face with Emma who's taken the seat across from him. He jumps a little, startled. "Jesus, Em."

"Good morning, August."

"Morning," he laughs, amazed to see her. "It's good to see you're okay. Please tell me you got smart and killed that lying bitch."

"This lying bitch?" Regina asks with a smirk, perched on a barstool at the counter next to his table.

"Guess it was just wishful thinking," August chuckles nervously.

"August."

"I'm sorry. Nice to see you, Regina," he adds sarcastically and scowls in her direction.

"August. Focus, please." The blonde points between herself and Regina. "We got problems."

"Problems?" August laughs mirthlessly. "Crack addicts got problems, Em. You two are smoked."

"Maybe."

"Maybe? You've got the entire agency gunning for you. Probably her agency, too."

"And what about you? Where you at?"

"Me?" August's eyebrows shoot up. "Where am I at? I find myself dragging my feet this morning. I think you owe me a little money anyway," he adds with a wink. "So what do you--" His focus shifts back to Regina when Emma looks over at her and nods that everything is okay. The brunette has only uttered one sentence this entire conversation and has spent the remainder of it silently glaring at him. "We don't understand each other, I get that. But I don't need these looks from you, okay? I've been in her life a long time."

"Focus, August." Emma balls up his napkin and throws it at him, "Here's the thing...I'm pissed off. They blew up my house and they shot at my wife. My own company!"

"Well, if she works for who the street says she works for..." he shrugs, "you're Macy's and Gimbel's. She would be XBox and you would be PlayStation. Know what I'm saying? You following me? The point is simple. Once you guys decide to get off the reservation, that's it. Then you're off the reservation."

"How bad is it?"

August leans back in his seat and sighs, "You remember Canada. That's kid's stuff next to this."

Regina's eyes widen in surprise, "That was you?"

"Oh, is that a turn-on?" August asks mockingly, then lowers his voice back at Emma. "Didn't she try to kill you with a car?" When Emma glares he raises his hands in defeat, "Fine, none of my business. But these are the facts. If you two separate from each other, you've got a shot. Not a great shot, Em, but a shot. You two stay together, you're dead. Unless you can find something they want more than they want you."

Emma looks back to Regina then, "I'm not going to stop trying, even if you still want to kill me."

The brunette rolls her eyes, and drawls like it's taking every ounce of energy she has in her to admit, "I don't _want_ to kill you."

"See?" Emma grins, "That's a start."

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They decide to go with August's last suggestion and find the something (someone) their firms want more than them. Regina asks Kathryn for help gathering intel and within hours she calls back to direct them to sub-basement D of the federal courthouse where Hook is being held.

They're in a surveillance van outside and Regina is behind the wheel studying the screen of a laptop she placed in the passenger seat, busy looking over blueprints of the building while Emma is in the back getting armed.

"30 second window. I cut the power, you grab the target. Simple and clean. Got it?"

"Got it," Emma nods, half listening while she loads her gun. "Tell me, how many?"

Regina rolls her eyes. They had been talking about previous assignments and their number of hits and she had changed the subject, trying to get Emma to focus on the task at hand before she went swarming into a heavily guarded building.

"Does it matter?"

"Should I go first?" Emma drawls sarcastically.

"Okay."

"I don't exactly keep count, but I would say...high 50's." She shrugs, still trying to estimate the figures in her mind. "Low 60's? I've been around the block, but the important thing is--"

"312."

Emma whips around to face Regina, " _312_? How?!"

"Some were two at a time." Emma looks down, her mouth hanging wide open in shock. "Darling--"

"I'm..." the blonde waves her off, "I'm..." She lets her words drift out and busies herself with a camera and earpiece headset she can use to talk to Regina and transmit what she's seeing back to the laptop in the van once inside. "Are you counting innocent bystanders?" Regina glares in response and Emma drops the subject for the time being. She creeps out of the van and climbs down a manhole cover, pausing halfway down the stairs that lead from the manhole cover to the sewer below and starts hammering through the wall, breaking into the drainage line under the courthouse. "You monitoring the perimeter?"

"I checked the perimeter."

"What about the police bands?"

"I'm on the police bands."

"Connected--"

"Emma, this is _not_ my first time."

"Think we've established that," the blonde grumbles.

"All right." Regina chuckles at Emma's tone before getting back on track, "Turn left." She watches the image projected to her from Emma's headset, frowning when she sees Emma turn right. "Left, Emma. Left!"

Emma pulls the headset off and points the camera at her face, scowling. "You don't need to talk to me like that. Okay? Be nice."

"Left, _please_."

"I can't go left," she holds the camera up to the dead-end she's facing to her left, slapping the closed off wall. "See? There is no left. Look. I have straight," she swings the camera around, showing Regina her surroundings, "or back the way I came. There's no left. What do you want?"

"Just stay there and wait for my mark."

"See what I'm sitting in? You see that? But go ahead, take your time."

"All right! That's enough, just stay there and wait for my mark. I'll find it." She's clicking furiously at her keyboard, squinting at the revisions on the blueprints and trying to find another option when she notices Emma's movements. "Wait for my mark. Almost there. I don't know what happened, just hold on." Emma isn't listening and has backed up and found an entrance through another drain down the pipeline. "Emma, what are you doing?" The camera from her headset shows her peeking through a storm drain. "What are you doing?"

"Cut the lights on my signal," Emma whispers back. "Now." She crawls out of the storm drain and walks into the room, gun drawn and the lights still on. "Kill the lights." Regina is halfway through overriding the power grid, not prepared for Emma's sudden orders. "Regina, kill the lights." She walks around a corner and two armed men notice her and start yelling, all of them now shooting at each other. "Kill the lights now!" The lights cut out and the room is completely dark. Gun shots are ringing out and Emma can't see who to shoot at anymore. "Turn 'em back on, turn 'em back on, turn 'em back on!"

Regina huffs, frazzled. "All right! Shut up. Shut up!"

.

.

.

Regina glares at Emma as she pushes Killian Jones into the back of the surveillance van. "You didn't wait for my signal."

Emma shrugs carelessly, "I improvised."

"You deviated from the plan."

"Plan was flawed."

"The plan was _not_ flawed."

"Anal."

"Organized."

"Regina," Emma sighs as they start to drive away. "90% of this job is instinct."

"Your instincts set off the alarms."

"My instincts got the job done. It might not have been the Regina Show-"

"No, it was the Emma Show. It was half-assed. Like Christmas, like our anniversary, like that time you forgot to bring my mother's birthday present. You are always the first to break team!"

"You don't want a team," Emma scoffs. "You want a servant for hire."

"I want someone I can count on."

"Babe, there's no air around you anymore."

"Oh, okay. What is _that_ supposed to mean?"

"It means there's no room for mistakes. No mistakes whatsoever! No spontaneity. Who can answer to that?"

"Well, you don't have to, because this isn't even a real marriage."

The couple sits in silence for a moment before Killian Jones croaks out, "Who the bloody hell _are_ you people?"

"Shut up!" they yell back in unison.

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.

.

They rent a motel room and sneak Hook in, tying him to a chair before they start questioning him.

"Now I realize you witnessed the missus and I working through some domestic issues," Emma drawls, pointing between herself where she's sitting in another chair in front of him and back to Regina who's sitting on the bed. "That's regrettable. But don't take that as a sign of weakness. That would be a mistake on your part. Now, tell us what you know. Why do both our bosses want you dead? You underst-" she looses her train of thought when Regina starts impatiently drumming her fingers on the nightstand. "Babe. Please?"

"Wrap it up."

"Maybe it's not a good idea to undermine me in front of the hostage. Sends a mixed message."

"Sorry," she mumbles sarcastically, dropping her hand, not sorry at all.

"Okay. Where was I?"

"A mistake on your part," Killian reminds her with a teasing smile.

"Shut up." She leans close to emphasize her next point, "Options. I'm gonna lay out your options for you, okay? Option A. You talk, we listen, no pain. Option B. You don't talk. I remove your thumbs with my pliers. It will hurt. Option C. Here's the thing...I like to vary the details a bit, but the punch line is, you die." When he sits quietly refusing to respond, Emma sighs. "Killian. We're impatient people, Killian."

"Can I get a drink, love? You don't happen to have any rum, do you?" Regina quickly stands up, yanks the phone on the nightstand from the wall, and hits Hook in the face with it. "A, Option A!" he yells. "Ow, that hurt!"

"Okay," Emma chuckles at a smirking Regina. "That was a nice shot." She focuses back on Hook who jerks his head down. "What's... You got a spasm?"

"I'm tied up," he rolls his eyes and motions down again. "Why don't you check my back pocket?" Regina pushes his head to the side and reaches into his back pocket, pulling out a folded photograph. The edges are worn and it's in black and white but it's definitely a picture of Regina and Emma. "I'm not the target. You are. Both of you. They found out you're married, so they teamed up and sent you to the same hit. It was a joint task force, both companies. Two competing agents living under the same roof? It's bad for business. They wanted you to take each other out."

"You were bait," Regina realizes.

"Well, they both wanted me dead. I offered myself as bait instead hoping you two would kill each other and not me."

Regina ignores him and moves the curtains aside, "You were bait or you are bait?"

Hook immediately closes his mouth and Emma jumps up ready to hit him again, making him flinch. "Belt! Check the belt, love."

Emma pulls his belt off and pushes a clasp on the side of the metal buckling face causing it to snap open and reveal a GPS tracker and audio recording device inside. "Two minutes."

Lights from a helicopter shine on Regina's face and she drops the curtains back into place, "One minute."

They jump out the bathroom window and make a quick escape before three vans full of armed agents swarm the property. They kick the door in and the helicopter circles overhead but no one notices them hiding beneath a storm drain.

"My way out is a boat standing by in La Paz."

"Cargo drop, Atlas Mountains," Emma huffs. "So what?"

"So at least apart we know what the odds are. Let's just call this what it is. And what it isn't."

"All right, so it's a crap marriage. I'm a mess and you're a disaster. We're both liars." She turns her head to look in Regina's eyes, "But you run, you'll always be running. I say we stay and fight. We finish this thing. Then if you want to go, you can go."

They fidget in strained silence, shuffling against each other before Regina finally speaks. "Well...thank you."

"Whatever. 'Let's call this what it is.' Jesus Christ, Regina."

.

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	6. Till Death Do Us Part

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"I need to get out of this dress."

Regina says it innocently and factually enough but Emma still turns to her with a dimpled smirk, "Now we're talkin'."

The brunette rolls her eyes and affectionately calls her an idiot in response before they start crawling from their position beneath the storm drain to their waiting surveillance van Regina had the foresight to park several miles away from the motel. Once inside she quickly strips off her dress and grabs a change of clothes while Emma starts arming weapons for them.

When the blonde looks up she sees her wife in tight black jeans and knee-high boots, the heel giving her the height to stand at eye-level with her spouse, a black camisole in hand ready to pull over her head. Emma is so busy staring at Regina's lean torso, which is naked other than the black lace bra she's rocking, that she doesn't notice her wife's lips turn up in a smug grin.

Regina reaches out and strokes Emma's bottom lip with the pad of her thumb, then traces down her jaw, and the blonde shivers. With two fingers under Emma's chin she clicks the blonde's teeth together when she closes her mouth.

"Stop making eyes at me and focus," she playfully admonishes her.

"I don't make eyes," Emma stubbornly insists while shaking her head to clear her thoughts. When Regina selects a plum colored silk blouse Emma rolls her eyes. "Put this on," she orders her wife, handing her a bulletproof vest because even if Regina still insists on being fashionable in the most ridiculous of circumstances she's still going to be safe. Emma yanks off her sweater and puts on a bulletproof vest of her own over her tank top, watching Regina button her shirt closed. The brunette pulls on a royal blue blazer over her plum blouse while Emma zips up a black leather jacket over her vest and pulls the hood up over her head. "Ready?" Regina nods in response and takes the guns Emma hands her. They climb out of the van and, despite the helicopter still circling overhead and gunman on the ground still conducting a search, silently stalk across the street to a closed Kost Mart and slip inside undetected. "This is a really good store," Emma whispers to her wife as they do a sweep of the building.

" _Focus_ ," Regina hisses back quietly with narrowed eyes. The sound of a door opening and closing in the distance alerts them to the presence of the team of hitmen entering through the same side door they had accessed, stumbling upon the broken entryway Emma had used a crowbar to pry open.

"Till death do us part, right?" Emma whispers, attempting a joke to fight off the sudden fluttering of nerves hitting her hard in the stomach.

Regina pauses, stilling her with a gentle hand when she sees right through her. She leans in to give her a quick kiss and attempts to reassure her, hoping to ease some of her fear, "There's no use pretending otherwise...I love you, my dear. I will love you until I die, and if there's life after that, I will love you then."

"I love you, too," Emma grins, the fluttering of nerves in her stomach transforming into butterflies in her chest, and steals another kiss. "See you in the next life, Regina."

"Likewise, Emma," the brunette winks and then they stand up, back to back, moving towards the sound of footfalls.

Emma stops moving and pulls Regina behind a clothing display, holding a finger to her lips to motion for the brunette to stay quiet. One of the hitters walks by and Emma reaches out quickly, hitting him in the head with the butt of her gun. He instantly drops, out cold, and the pair scramble to catch him and lower him to the ground quietly. Regina removes his rifle and pulls the strap over her own shoulder before following after Emma. She covers the blonde who silently approaches two more armed men.

Emma tucks her gun into the waistband of her jeans in favor of a pair of large wrenches hanging from a plumbing display. She swings the large metal tools, the size of baseball bats, hitting the two men and knocking them out as well. Her wild swinging knocks over a flood lamp though and before it can fall to the ground with a loud clatter she bounces on one foot to catch the light in midair with the other foot and slowly lowers it to the ground.

Straightening back up she bounces on her feet again and swings the wrenches around in her hand with a goofy lopsided grin that makes Regina smile and want to laugh.

They disarm the two men and slide behind a kitchen display, crouching low and listening to the quickly approaching footsteps of four more men. Regina looks to her left and notices a rolling cart with knife blocks on top and motions with her head to Emma before removing the rifle from around her back and rolling up the sleeves of her blazer.

With another nod to Emma the two move silently and Regina rolls the cart into position. When one man comes into view she throws a knife, hitting him in the chest and killing him. Emma spots one more and hits him in the head with the butt of her gun, knocking him out cold. She spots the last two armed men as they start to approach Regina and raises her gun to stop their movements while the brunette lets more knives fly. She hits the two armed men in the chest and, unfortunately for Emma, a third knife impales the blonde in the thigh. She grits her teeth and looks up at Regina with a scowl.

"Sorry," Regina whispers with a shrug and Emma glares back at her.

"We'll talk about this later," she grits out before pulling the blade from her flesh.

As they walk down another aisle listening for more men Emma gets distracted by the sight of Regina's ass in the tight black jeans in front of her and swings a little too wide on a sweep to the right, knocking all the canned food off a shelf with the barrel of her rifle.

" _Jesus_!" Regina hisses and Emma wonders if her wife has always been this skilled at yelling at her in a whisper.

"I didn't touch a thing."

"Yes, you did," Regina snaps and when the gunshots start ringing out over their heads she wonders if it would be too immature to gloat about being right. They sprint down the aisle, heads ducked low, and return fire before sliding into an open elevator. The pair stands side by side in comfortable silence, weapons armed and ready, and when the doors open to the next floor they immediately start firing. The number of hitmen is surprising and when more crash through the glass ceiling overhead they step back onto the elevator and the closing doors catch the bullets aimed for their bodies. "Sorry about the knife in the--"

"I don't want to talk about it," the blonde cuts her off and Regina rolls her eyes but gives in and lets the subject drop, for now, when the elevator doors open back up.

"I'll fly."

"I'll be bait," Emma agrees with a nod before moving into position. "I'm going clockwise, watch my six."

Regina climbs up onto the rafters and drapes her body across one of the metal beams, attaching a sniper scope to her rifle while Emma wanders around on the floor below killing everything in her path. The gunshots draw the attention of the other gunmen and when they move to advance on Emma, Regina fires from above.

After several of their comrades drop to the floor the team notices the brunette in the rafters above and turn their fire on her. They're too far away to hit her with any accuracy but the swarm of shots is overwhelming and Regina startles. Emma looks up when she notices the heat has been taken off her and watches helplessly as Regina falls.

She gasps and runs towards her wife, shooting over her shoulder to hold off fire. Crouching down, she lifts Regina up and pulls the brunette's arm over her shoulder so she can support her wife's weight and help her up from where she'd been trying to crawl away.

Regina hasn't taken a serious hit but the fall dazed her and she limped away on a sore knee before falling once again and trying to crawl to safety.

They scramble to a tool shed, firing as they go, and collapse inside. When Emma sits up and snaps the door closed behind them Regina sees blood in blonde hair and starts to panic.

"Oh my god," she jumps to Emma's side, gently brushing the hair back from her temple. "Are you okay?"

Regina's fingers are sticky, smeared with Emma's blood, but the blonde is quick to assure her, "I'll be fine. They only grazed me." Noticing the blood running down Regina's forearm and dripping off the end of her fingertips her eyes widen and she pushes Regina's other hand away from where it's still brushing against her temple to examine her wife instead. "What about you? Are you okay?"

Regina brushes the blood down her arm and flicks it off her fingertips, "Nicked my arm in the rainstorm of bullets." Emma finds a cloth and rips it, then ties the material around Regina's bicep and winces when she makes her wife hiss in pain. The gunshots have stopped and the store is quiet so while Emma reloads their weapons Regina peeks through one of the bullet holes in the wall of the shed and sees the gunmen positioning themselves outside, getting prepared to fire on them and take them out for good.

"How's it look?"

"Piece of cake."

Emma recognizes that Regina is putting on a brave face for her benefit but she doesn't question it, she simply tries to arm her more so if she's taken out her wife still has a good chance to escape and survive.

She loops tethers for two handgun-style, magazine-fed, self-loading machine pistols capable of fully automatic burst firing crisscross around Regina's shoulders. She knows Regina knows how to handle them but she can't help but precaution her, "Watch these, they tend to jam." She picks up a rifle and hands it to Regina before taking one for herself, "You favor your left, babe, so I'll cover your right." Regina locks eyes with her then and they both know this might be it. Emma can't help but feel guilty, "Damn, that boat in La Paz is looking pretty good right about now, isn't it?"

"Well, it rains a lot this time of year," Regina teases her with a smirk. When Emma's lips turn up in the shy smile that makes the brunette's heart warm and flutter she easily admits, "There's nowhere I'd rather be than right here, with you." Emma's little smile breaks out into a full blown grin and Regina gives her a quick peck, "Shut up."

They stand and take deep breaths, turning to nod at each other before kicking the door open and immediately firing off shots. They fight back to back and when Emma swings around Regina ducks and presses her front to Emma's, holding her arms on either side of the blonde's body and they form a perfect circle, firing off shots in a complete 360 degree formation. One of the hitters is in the rafters now and when he fires a grenade from a rocket launcher Emma takes a knee and with a hand on Regina's bulletproof vest tugs her wife down to crouch beside her, evading the shot which hits the tool shed behind them instead.

They both drop their now empty rifles, grab handguns, and stand face to face firing off shots. With a nod Emma directs Regina to turn and they move back to back to fire some more before Emma leads her with a stiffened arm to swivel and continue firing from a different angle.

They're moving in perfect harmony, reading each other's movements and the situation around them, taking perfect shots and eliminating the enemy at an alarming pace. When another grenade is fired from the rocket launcher Emma once again pushes Regina down but this time pulls the trigger of the shotgun strapped to her wife's back while she's bent over and hits the armed man firing the shots in the rafters up above. The brunette stands and throws her wife a new mag which she catches and loads in one fluid movement while Regina shoots the last remaining targets approaching them from the left.

Pausing to catch their breath they remain in position to fire and listen for any other hostiles. The room around them is completely quiet and just as they begin to think they might have actually _won_ they hear the sound of heavy boots stepping on glass. They move to stand side by side, ready to face the unknown danger together, and a man walks out of the smoke.

"No need for that, loves." Hook holds his hands out to stop them from firing when they both point their weapons at him. "Your bosses have sent me to fetch you. Seems they're willing to make a deal."

.

.

.

Hook leads them into a conference room and finally pulls the blindfolds off. Seated at a conference table in front of them are the Dark One and the Queen of Hearts. Cora motions to the chairs positioned on the other side of the table, "Take a seat."

Regina glares at her mother before rigidly taking one of the offered seats. The woman set her up with every intention of having her killed and now has the nerve to act like they're simply having a business meeting.

Emma still stands stubbornly behind her wife and only moves to drop down beside her when Regina looks up to her, her eyes conveying the need for a united front.

Gold peers at them over the cup of tea he's pouring for himself, "What can we do for you?"

"No games," Regina snaps. "You summoned us, so tell us what you want."

"I'm sorry," the Dark One clinks his spoon against the edge of his tea cup, "you're going to have to be more specific."

"You know damn well what she's talking about," Emma scowls. "What the hell do you want with us? You two are the ones who sold us out! You sent us to the same hit, which was a fake. It was just a fucking set up to try and get us to kill each other, and when that didn't work you sent our own agencies after us!"

"Well, that is quite a litany of grievances, isn't it?"

"Maybe I don't need answers," Emma leans forward menacingly. "Maybe I just need to punch you in the face."

"Enough of this," Cora snaps. "We brought you here to make a deal."

Regina fixes her with a skeptical frown, "Why would we ever believe that?"

"Because I never go back on my deals," Gold answers for the both of them.

Regina turns her attention to her mother, "And what's in it for you?"

Cora smiles at her, but it's not the warm smile of a mother to her daughter, it's the cold and calculating smile of the Queen of Hearts. "I'm taking over Gold's Guild. The Dark One is..." she smirks, "...retiring. I need to merge the Guild and the Royal Guard and you've just killed a large portion of my new staff. We're proposing a truce. You can have your life back, your life together."

"We get peace?" Regina questions skeptically. "It's all over, just like that?"

"Actually," Gold points at Emma, "that's where you come in Mrs. Smith. Or should I say, Miss Swan? I'm selling Cora the Guild because I miss my son. He left me because of the nature of our business, couldn't stomach all the death. I'm hoping leaving it behind will prove to him just how much he means to me."

"That's a heartwarming story," Emma drawls, "but what does it have to do with me?"

"I believe you know Baelfire--"

"Baelfire?" Emma gulps and Regina watches the color drain from her wife's face as she goes pale.

"--and I believe you are the key to getting him home."

"Baelfire is..." Emma's mind races and her heart pounds. "He's your son?"

"I don't suppose he mentioned that during your time together," Gold nods like that information isn't surprising to him and slides a folder across the table. Regina opens it up and sees dozens of pictures of a man she doesn't recognize and the puzzle doesn't fit together on his connection to her wife until she flips past the pictures to a birth certificate.

**MOTHER: EMMA SWAN**

**FATHER: NEAL CASSIDY**

"I brought _that_ to his attention," Cora informs them, nodding to the birth certificate as Regina wordlessly passes it to Emma, "made him a deal. I could supply him with the one person who could still find his son in exchange for his firm. It would make sense to give it up before going after Baelfire anyway, there's no way he would return to this life he's run from for so long."

"How do you know I'll be able to find Neal? I haven't heard from him in years."

"But that's not entirely true, is it? You share a son. There must be a way to stay in contact to check on the boy."

Emma's head snaps up from the birth certificate she's still got in her hands, "We don't _share_ him. I get a photo emailed to me once a year, that's it. I can't help you."

"Unless you want us to kill you and your wife then you _can_ and you _will_ help me find him, dearie."

"After all," Cora smirks, "we're all one big, happy family now."

"So," Gold claps his hands together with a victorious smile on his face and recaps, "she gets the Guild, I get my son, and you two get each other. Have we got a deal?"

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	7. Endings and Epilogues

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this ending will be going a different route from the movie, a sappier route playing up the ROM aspect of the rom-com action movie we've experienced thus far. I appreciate the subscriptions and reviews. Please check out my other works and let me know if there are others you'd like brought over from FF, though I do plan on focusing my attention on my original AO3 work first.

_"So," Gold claps his hands together with a victorious smile on his face and recaps, "she gets the Guild, I get my son, and you two get each other. Have we got a deal?"_

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Emma and Regina share a look before the brunette purses her lips and gives her wife a terse nod. Turning back to the Queen of Hearts and the Dark One she takes a deep breath, "No. No deal." She pauses before addressing Hook who is still standing behind them, watching over them like a guard would his prisoners, his presence ignored until now. "Kill her."

At Regina's words he pulls a gun out from under his coat and fires two quick shots, killing Cora instantly. The Queen of Heart's body slumps from her seat where she'd been perched like it was a throne, falling to the floor as the Dark One's eyes widen in shock.

"Regina, dearie, I--"

"Save it," Regina cuts him off bitterly. "That woman was my mother and she _still_ joined forces with you against us. She plotted to have her own daughter killed," she seethes, "but that's not exactly a new M.O. for her, is it?" At Gold's surprised look she sneers, "Yes, I know all about Zelena. During my first year with the Royal Guard my mother sent me on a hit and, luckily, the target told me who she was before I could kill her. I pretended as though I had never found the target--my own sister. She faked her death, with some help from my father, which I assume is why my mother killed him. She's alive and well, if you were wondering, and should be here any moment. In the meantime, Mr. Jones met the conditions of his deal with you by bringing us here. He is no longer in your debt and you will excuse him."

Gold looks over her shoulder at the leather clad killer standing behind her and nods silently.

"Thank you, your majesty," Hook tells Regina with a little dip of his head. Emma is sure if he was any dumber he might have tried an actual bow and she can't tell whether or not her wife would have let him leave alive at that point. She looks over at the brunette and can see the vein pulsing in her forehead and her knuckles going white as she grips the arms of her chair firmly.

On their way from the bullet-ridden Kost Mart where Hook had found them to Gold's offices where he blindfolded them to act as though they weren't about to ambush the very people he had promised to help, they had devised their plan and Regina had quickly explained that she'd gotten in contact with Zelena and asked for her help.

"I can't help but wonder why I'm still alive then, dearies. You've thrown quite the coup here today. I don't suspect it would have been terribly hard to convince that imbecile to fire a couple more shots and finish me like you've finished her."

"My mother tried to kill me, she tried to kill my wife, she tried to kill my sister. She made me a monster and I will _not_ give her the opportunity to do the same to the boy. You can tell us all day long that you love Baelfire but this deal you struck with my mother wasn't some selfless act to get your son back, it benefitted you to do so, like all your deals. I don't trust you any more than I trusted her--"

" _I_ never tried to kill my own offspring."

"That we know of," Regina glares at him, unmoved by his interjection. "The _only_ reason you're still alive is because we need you."

Regina is practically vibrating with tension and seething with rage by now so Emma reaches over and places her hand over her wife's. Slowly the shaking stops, her grip on the armrest loosens, and the brunette seems to calm.

Not wanting to risk another blow up Emma takes over, "I'm going to contact Neal. If he _does_ get back to me and he _does_ decide to meet, I will ask him if he wants to speak to you. I'm not going to force him into a relationship with you." When Gold huffs, Emma glares, "Do you really think anything will convince him, short of coercion? He has to want it for himself for it to be genuine or he's just going to run again and then neither of us will be able to find him."

"Very well, but--"

"No," Emma cuts him off. "You're not the one running shit anymore. I will contact Neal and I will talk to him, the rest is his decision. In exchange, you're going to give us new identities and ensure we are safe. This is our deal, our way, and if you even _think_ about double-crossing us or putting another hit out I will come back here and I will beat you to death with your own cane."

"Ooh," comes a voice from the now open door behind them, "I quite like her, sis."

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.

.

As part of the deal they ensured Zelena would take over Gold's Guild and he would help her merge his agency with the Royal Guard before leaving the business behind for good.

_"I haven't decided on a name yet. Maybe the Royal Guild? The Dark Guard?" She strokes the sleeve of Emma's jacket, flirting with her for no reason other than annoying her sister. "You really are a White Knight, aren't you? Acting as Regina's personal bodyguard against Gold."_

_Emma rips her arm back from Zelena's touch, "She doesn't need a bodyguard. She's the bravest woman I know."_

_"Ooh, such fire in your eyes. With that kind of passion and your penchant for violence maybe I could persuade you to join my forces as a Dark Knight."_

_"I'm not Batman," Emma scoffs._

Zelena had somehow managed to remove anything of value from the remains of their home--Regina was relieved a box of pictures and two suitcases of clothing had made it out of the destruction and Emma almost cried when she found her favorite red leather jacket--and loaded it in Emma's old yellow Bug. From the brief amount of time she spent with her sister-in-law Emma assumed she knew how much Regina hated the car and that was why it was chosen as their getaway vehicle.

They drive it to a safehouse where Gold arranges to have one of his doctors meet them to tend to their wounds. Emma insists she will be fine with a shower, some peroxide, and a couple band-aids but Regina definitely needs stitches on her bicep where she was nicked.

After a thourough examination the doctor leaves them with antibiotics, change of bandages, and instructions to keep their wounds clean and cared for. Regina had been quiet since getting in the car to leave Gold's office and once the door to the safehouse is closed behind the doctor and the locks are secured in place she takes her wife by the hand and leads her to the bathroom where they shower together like they had in their own bathroom the morning after their fight, before breakfast and the chase on the interstate.

After their fight the shower together had been a way of cleaning away the damage they'd inflicted on each other, kissing each bruise and scratch they'd caused on the other's body in a silent apology. This shower however is filled with Regina's ragged sobbing.

"I know she was a terrible person, but she was still my mother. I had to have Hook pull the trigger. I didn't want to resent you for it later on and I'm not strong enough--"

Emma holds her wife in her arms and lets the water rain down on both of them, pressing a gentle kiss to her temple, "You can have happiness now, you just have to fight for it, and if you won't then I will. We are going to do this the way we do everything from now on. Together."

Regina looks up into Emma's eyes and is overwhelmed by the look of tender affection directed at her. She reaches up on tippy-toes to kiss the blonde, feeling the love pouring out and warming the heart she tried to keep cold and closed off for so long.

_Zelena took a moment to study her sister and the blonde. "You're in love with her," she finally decides with a nod. "I can tell by the way you look at her."_

_"Oh?" Regina chuckles, not used to being read so well especially about an emotion like love that her mother had drilled into her was a weakness. "And how exactly do I do that?"_

_"The way the moon looks at the sun," Zelena replies instantly. "Like for the first time in your life you feel warm."_

"Together," she repeats like a vow.

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Emma sends Neal an email containing only two words.

**It's time.**

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It takes Neal three days to reply to her message and when he does it's with two words of his own.

**Storybrooke, Maine.**

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In the distance Emma sees a sign labeled 'Welcome to Storybrooke' and eases the Bug to the side of the road. Over the town line a man and a small boy get out of a silver SUV and Emma starts to panic.

"I don't think I can do this."

Regina takes her hand, "Together."

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The 10-year-old boy with Emma's chin and dimples and green eyes looks up at her, "Are you Emma Swan?"

"Yeah," she admits softly, her voice catching in her throat. "Who are you?"

"My name's Henry." He rocks on his feet from heel to toe with a mischievous little smile and all Regina can see is a tiny version of her wife. _EmmaEmmaEmma_ her heart sings and she loves the boy instantly. "I'm your son."

Emma chuckles a little and brushes away stray tears before kneeling down to be at eye level with her _son_ and holds open her arms.

He doesn't hesitate, like he's known her all his life and has been patiently waiting for her to come see him, and launches himself at her, enveloping her in a hug. She squeezes him tight and when Neal tells her Henry _had_ known all about her and _had_ been waiting to meet her when the time was right she hugs him too, thanking him over and over again for keeping their boy safe and not making her a stranger.

When Neal tells Regina that Henry is named after her father because he was a fine man who had helped them disappear, she hugs him as well.

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They move into a large home on Mifflin Street that the people in town call the Mayoral Mansion, though the mayor lives in an estate two blocks away. Henry lives with his dad in a loft apartment in town and his three parents work out an arrangement to share custody.

Neal works for the mayor's office doing IT and it doesn't take much effort for him to get Regina a job at the stables. When Emma grows restless she takes work from a bounty hunter in Boston.

"Want to come with me on this one, babe?"

Regina looks up from where she is helping Henry with his math homework, "Do you really need help tracking down a bail jumper, darling?"

Emma shrugs and tries to entice her with a flirtatious wiggle of her eyebrows, "Stakeout rhymes with makeout."

"Moms, you're being gross."

They both look at him in shock, startled by his casual attitude as it's the first time he's addressed either of them with that title.

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The next time he does so is at his school. The blonde and brunette are seated in the office, waiting to pick him up. He'd called his dad to be picked up early because he hadn't felt well and the nurse needs the signature of the guardian coming to get him, so she looks up at the women waiting and asks him, "Which one's your mom?"

Henry simply shrugs, perfectly imitating his blonde mother's nonchalance. "They both are."

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"I'm interested in the progress you've made in the last year."

"Umm... Doing all right, aren't we?" Emma swivels in her chair in front of Archie to glance over at a smirking Regina. "I'm not gonna lie to you, there were times when I wanted to--" she flexes her bicep and clicks her tongue to make a snapping sound, acting out how she'd like to choke Regina until her head pops right off her body, "--kill her, but--"

Regina shares an amused smile with her, "Likewise."

"--couldn't take the shot. Who'd have thought."

"That's a good sign," Archie laughs. "Sometimes you have to battle through."

"That's marriage, right," Regina says with a sly wink.

"Yeah," Emma smiles at her again, all warmth. "Take your best shot, and--"

"Oh, we moved. We've recently gotten in contact with Emma's son--"

"Our son."

"Our son," Regina smiles, repeating the amendment.

Archie hates to potentially burst the bubble and ruin this lifted mood the couple walked in with today because he's so impressed with the progress he's seen since their last visit a year ago, but he feels obligated to warn them of the reality of marriage. "You know there will always be challenges. Threats out there." Regina and Emma look at each other, weighing his words and knowing how true they are, especially when applied to their relationship. "But you can handle it together."

Emma knows they can handle anything together, that it's become their mantra, but she can't help but tease her wife, "So far."

"So _far_?" Regina laughs, "What is that?"

"I'm leaving room for the unkown."

"So far," Regina scoffs with a chuckle and roll of her eyes.

"And do you feel your relationship styles are more conducive to this--"

"Ask us the sex question," the blonde interrupts him with a mischievous glint in her eye.

"Emma," Regina admonishes her, a blush instantly warming her cheeks.

Archie squirms in his seat and Emma smirks, holding up both hands to flex her fingers and mouth _TEN_ while Regina side-eyes her, fighting off a smirk of her own.

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After two years Neal confesses to the nature of his monthly trips to Boston. Emma takes them for work and had assumed Neal was privately seeing someone, but lately he'd started coming home pale and looking sickly and weak. She finally tells him to spill it or she was going to spill his guts all over her living room rug.

With a somber laugh he admits, "Cancer might beat you to it, Em."

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Three months after that the cancer had spread from his lungs and the occassional cough or rasp Emma noticed when they'd first shown up in Storybrooke, the one Neal had written off as too many cigarettes in his youth, finally took him.

At the funeral Henry holds Emma's hand and leans against her arm while they both cried. Regina stands behind them with a hand on the small of Emma's back to keep her grounded and a hand on Henry's shoulder to soothe him, offering them both silent comfort with the gentle weight of her palm while she cried as well. They had lost one family member and were grieving the same way they did everything else, together.

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On the cusp of being a teenager, it was getting harder to lock Henry down for any affection but that night he climbed into bed between them and let his Ma cuddle him and asked his Mom to read him a bedtime story.

"What would you like to hear, my little prince?"

"Tell me the story about how the sun loved the moon so much he died every night to let her breathe."

"There was once a moon," she speaks softly and brushes shaggy hair back from his eyes to lull him to sleep as she gazes at her twin suns, Emma and Henry, who bring her warmth every day, "as beautiful as can be, only the stars could fathom, but the sun could not see..."

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It takes them a long time to move on. They'll never forget, his Ma reminds him, always insisting that it was because of Neal that Henry had his best chance at a happy, healthy childhood unlike any of his parents. The last time his Ma had told him that, his Mom had squeezed her thigh and told her, 'you gave our son to Neal for that very reason, my love. You both gave him his best chance.'

"You should ask her to marry you again."

"What?" Emma laughs, almost dropping the baseball Henry tossed to her. They were playing catch in the back yard, both banished from the kitchen for stealing too many ingredients Regina was using to make dinner.

_"No more lazy grazing. Both of you, outside."_

"Well, you eloped last time, right? For your cover. You could renew your vows and we can have a ceremony here," he drops the ball and runs over to her, jumping around excited. "Uncle August and Aunt Ruby and Aunt Kat and Auntie Zee can come!"

Emma looks inside at her wife, the wife who at one point had tried to kill her and now had mastered cooking because 'our child isn't going to be raised on Pop-Tarts, Swan.'

She turns her attention back to Henry she smiles at him and ruffles his hair, "Sounds like a great idea, kid."

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"I give the whole thing six months, tops."

"You said that last time," Emma reminds Ruby with a chuckle.

"How long's it been now?"

"Eleven years."

"Twelve," Regina corrects her with a smile and shake of her head, knowing Emma's messing with her.

"Right. Eleven or twelve years."

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They buy Henry a car for his 16th birthday and when he pulls them both into a tight hug Regina's heart constricts thinking about the little boy who used to look up to smile at her and is now looking down, beaming and thanking them over and over again.

They wave him away, letting him take it out to enjoy the rest of his day with his friends as long as he texts them to check in and is home by curfew. With some puppy dog eyes that look alarmingly similar to Emma's he gets that time extended an extra two hours and rushes out the door, yelling over his shoulder, "Love you, moms!"

Emma drapes her arm over Regina's shoulders and it reminds her of their first date and their baby is driving away from their home and it's all too much and the slow stream of tears turns into full-blown waterworks.

"Babe? What's wrong?"

"He's growing up so fast," she wails, turning to whimper into her wife's sweater.

"Oh, Gina," Emma chuckles and then yelps when Regina pinches her.

"Don't you 'oh, Gina' me, Emma Swan!"

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When they hear Henry get home that night they both sigh in relief. Their room is dark and Emma knows Regina has relaxed because she's playing with her blonde locks, twirling a curl around her finger. Something is bothering her and Emma doesn't think it's just Henry getting older. She leans forward and kisses Regina sweetly, taking her time to pour out every ounce of love she has for the woman.

"Want to talk about it?"

Regina freezes in a panic reflexively, but then she thinks about all the _togethertogethertogether_ moments they've had and admits, "When we were first married I looked into in vitro fertilization. My mother found out about it and told me 'love is weakness, Regina.' She had told me that my entire life, and it's haunted me a very long time, but it especially effected our relationship. That was when I started to pull away from you."

Emma pulls Regina's left hand closer, placing it over her heart so her wife can feel the steady beating of her heart. "Love isn't weakness," she whispers, absentmindedly playing with the brunette's wedding ring, "it's strength."

"Together," Regina whispers back, the same promise they made in the shower at the safehouse, when they first met Henry, when Neal told them he was sick, in their second wedding vows; all those _togethertogethertogether_ moments flicker through her mind again and give her strength.

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Emma says she wants to reassure Henry he isn't being replaced by a newer model first before any official action is taken because when she was three the foster family she was with sent her back when they conceived a child of their own.

"We want to expand our family. Give another kid their best chance. What do you think about that?"

He could tell she was nervous and then relieved when his smile wasn't forced or faked because he was honestly excited.

"I've always wanted to be a big brother!"

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"Congratulations, Mrs. and Mrs. Swan," the adoption agent tells them with a smile, placing a car seat on the table in front of them with a tiny baby buckled inside. She is three months old and they drove to an agency in New York City to pick her up.

When Regina unfastens the buckles and gently lifts her from the car seat she takes a moment to just gaze at her daughter and smile with tears in her eyes at the grumpy expression that crosses her face at being disturbed from her slumber.

"Hiya stranger," she kisses the baby's little face and falls in love in an instant, the same flood of motherly instincts hitting her like they had with Henry.

The baby's little blonde curls peek out from the bottom of the cap she's wearing and Emma strokes her fat cheeks and kisses her forehead, gently pressing her lips against the hair so similar to her own.

Henry tickles her belly when she yawns and stretches and she opens her little eyes and gazes at him. They're kind of grey looking right now, but his Mom said a baby's eyes can change colors and he knows there's no genetic tie, but he's hoping they end up dark brown like hers since he got Ma's green eyes.

Henry knows his mothers both have to fight their natural instincts sometimes. That he's kicked his soccer ball too close to the car once and his Mom had intercepted it perfectly. That the neighbor had stepped behind Ma and clapped his hand on her shoulder, startling her, and she'd had him wheezing on the ground in the next breath. He knows he's never been able to sneak out of the house because they're both alert and wary of their surroundings. He knows his Ma would be perfect for the sheriff in their town, but she's still struggling with her redemption and that's why she goes after bounties. He knows his Mom battles her inner rage and that's why she loves working with the horses because they calm her. He also knows his mothers love him unconditionally and when his sister is old enough he'll teach her how to spot the tracker his mothers hid in his car because he's sure they'll place one on hers as well.

"Ready to take her home, kid?"

His Ma still calls him that, even though once he finally hit his big growth spurt he started to tower over both his mothers.

_"Your mother is a short ass, kid. Don't let her heels fool you."_

_"I am not a 'short ass' and watch your language!"_

_"Your mother also swears like a sailor when she thinks you can't hear her."_

"Oh, god. I just realized I'm outnumbered. Can I go visit Grandpa next weekend?"

Henry also knew his mothers both kind of hated his grandfather--though he was his Ma's boss at one point and seemed to have an odd sort of respect for her, and was his Mom's mentor at one point and it pissed her off when his Ma accurately called him her 'frenemy'--so their answer didn't surprise him.

"No," they replied in unison.

**THE END**


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